


Gravity

by giantsequoia



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Biotic play, M/M, Threesome, Tickling, alcohol cw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2017-05-21
Packaged: 2018-11-03 03:44:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 28,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10958952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giantsequoia/pseuds/giantsequoia
Summary: Repost of an old fic.Shepard and Steve are committed to one another, but flexible. They invite James to join them for a threesome (with a hell of a lot of tequila, foreplay, and biotic shenanigans beforehand).





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **FYI:** This story is fantasy. The sex it depicts is not intended to be realistic.

Everything felt more intense to James when he was this drunk. The world seemed bright and vivid. He could feel the air moving over his skin. The tequila had put him in a sensual, adventurous mood, inclined to take deep breaths and enjoy every moment. Sure, the world was also spinning around him, but it was a slow and gentle spin, a pleasant buzz. It wasn’t so bad that he hadn’t been able to make his way back to the ship, all the way from Purgatory, without falling over more than twice. And Shepard and Steve had been there to help him up, though Steve was probably almost as drunk as he was. There was no way to tell how drunk Shepard was, however – neither James nor Steve had been able to match him drink for drink, yet he maintained the bearing of one who was stone-cold sober.

Shepard was whispering in Steve’s ear as James followed them through the CIC, carefully keeping one hand on the central complex along the way to the elevator. He liked watching the two of them together. In contrast to the cool, placid demeanour Steve kept up while on duty, he always seemed to be smiling when he was around Shepard. He was relaxed instead of stretched thin for a change, having fun instead of working. He’d been allowing himself to laugh more often as the night went on – Steve, as it turned out, was a giggly drunk when he was happy. James was elated and relieved to see his friend enjoying himself like this. Steve reminded him much more now of the witty, cheerful guy he’d met on Fehl Prime nearly a decade ago.

As for Shepard, he had remained his somewhat reticent and soft-spoken self throughout the evening, occasionally deigning to offer commentary, incisive and deadpan but light-hearted, on the escalating inebriation of his crew. James had worked hard at cracking his Commander’s cold shell, deploying his best jokes and a series of innuendos accompanied by lots of winking, eyebrow waggling, and what he hoped were sexy grins. He hadn’t even been consciously choosing to do it at first, but upon remembering the invitation Steve had extended to him the night before, James turned up the charm. If Shepard and Steve found him entertaining, he’d damn well give them some entertainment.

James hadn’t yet managed to get Shepard to totally cut loose, but his efforts had been rewarded with a smirk here and there, a few smouldering gazes, and even a snicker or two. James felt happy and proud of himself that he’d managed to liven things up for both his best friend and his Commander, who was also his friend. Both of them had sorely needed this brief vacation from the war, and if there was anybody in the galaxy who deserved a night of relaxation and pleasure, it was these two.

“We’re lucky, you know,” Shepard commented as they reached the elevator and Steve poked its control panel, his usual calm grace with technology noticeably diminished. “These things used to be a lot slower and more complicated to operate. I doubt either of you could manage it without my help.”

“Sure, Loco,” James said, meandering into the elevator as its door hissed open. “You and your cyber liver can help me out with whatever you think I need.”

“You sure it’s my liver you’re interested in?” Shepard shot back.

Steve broke into snickers as he leaned against the elevator wall, throwing a knowing look in Shepard’s direction. Shepard stared back, but James was sure he caught the flicker of a smile passing over his face. He winked as Shepard’s gaze returned to him. James enjoyed Shepard’s good-natured teasing, especially when it got Steve to laugh.

“Mr. Cortez here has graciously accepted my invite to come up to my cabin with me for another drink,” Shepard said as the elevator began to move, so smoothly and silently that James barely noticed it. “How about you, Vega? You up for some more fun?”

Abruptly, James realized Shepard had moved at lot closer to him as soon as the elevator door had closed. The Commander’s clear blue eyes were staring into his, hinting at something. James could almost feel the heat of his body.

“You suggestin’ something, Loco?” James asked.

“ _Maaay_ be,” Shepard said softly. The tip of his tongue flicked out across his upper lip. James followed the motion with his eyes, images and ideas blooming in his mind as he allowed himself to think of what might happen up there. They were very bad, against-regulations ideas, it was true, but on some level, James found he’d been looking forward to them since Steve had first broached the subject.

“Why don’t you come on in, Mr. Vega,” Steve said with a purr in his voice. “I’m sure we’ll find something entertaining to do.”

Well, that sealed the deal. Or did it? He could still say no.

James swallowed, suddenly keenly aware of the two attractive, athletic men sharing this small, enclosed space with him. He cared deeply about both of them, though in different ways, and both of them were now eyeing him in a way that was starting to provoke definite reactions from his groin area. But then, what had he expected was going to happen?

“Yeah, alright,” he finally managed to say. “Why not?”

“You sure?” Shepard asked wryly as the elevator door slid open, revealing the entrance to Shepard’s cabin. “Maybe you’re too drunk.”

James scoffed loudly, some of his confidence restored by the subtle challenge. “No such thing! Let’s get this party started.”

He launched himself forward, leading the way out of the elevator. Steve pressed the door control and headed inside, remaining mostly steady despite the amount of tequila he’d imbibed. Shepard came after him, herding James forward with a firm hand on the small of his back. A light, pleasant shiver raced up James’s spine at the touch, raising goosebumps along his arms.

James paused at the top of the shallow stairs that led down into the living area. He stared around at the tastefully appointed space, the realization still dawning on him that Shepard and Steve were entirely serious about wanting him to join them in bed. His heartbeat was speeding up from a combination of nerves and excitement, but mostly nerves.

“Steve, can you get the tequila?” Shepard asked, passing James on his way to a set of shelves. He took down three crystalline snifters from a collection of six that stood between a holodata archive and a stack of traditional paper-bound books. While Shepard carried the glasses over to the coffee table, Steve opened a small refrigerator and knelt down in front of it. He took a medium-sized amber bottle from within and joined Shepard by the couch.

“You going to stand there all night?” Steve said to James as he handed the bottle to his boyfriend and sat down on the couch. James caught up to himself with a start and descended the stairs briskly. He flopped down on the couch with such a glaring lack of grace that Shepard snorted. James hoped his face wasn’t too red. Or if it was, that the other two would think it was from the alcohol.

The amused glance Shepard threw in his direction as he opened the tequila bottle dashed that hope. James laughed weakly and rubbed his forehead, trying to calm his racing heart through pure will. He wondered if it would be inappropriate to put his feet on the table. He had never before been so unsure of himself in a social setting, not even in one that was virtually guaranteed to end in sex. What was different this time?

With his hand not holding the bottle, Shepard made a fist and flicked it upward gently. The three snifters flared biotic blue and rose from the table until they were about as high as Shepard’s chest. He proceeded to nonchalantly pour a measure of tequila into each.

“Showing off, Loco?” James teased as one of the snifters floated over to him. He couldn’t help being impressed; he’d never seen Shepard manipulate biotic energy so precisely before.

“Please,” Shepard said as he sat down between Steve and James, taking a second snifter and leaving the open bottle on the table. The third drifted over to Steve. “That’s a party trick.”

“He’s not being modest,” Steve said. “You just wait until he gets going.”

James found his curiosity piqued, but he was distracted by the aroma of the tequila he was holding. The smell was considerably more enticing than the cheap stuff they’d been drinking at Purgatory. Shepard hadn’t provided any salt or limes, so James took a cautious sip. His eyes widened, gaze flicking to the tequila bottle, and he let out an inarticulate growl of pleasure.

“Good?” Shepard asked with a knowing look in his eyes.

James took another sip, this time savouring the heavenly taste instead of swallowing it immediately. “ _Madre de Dios_ ,” he groaned. “I haven’t had tequila this good since...”

He trailed off, not bothering to finish the sentence. _Since Earth._

“Can’t get this brand on the Citadel anymore,” Steve noted before taking a sip of his own. His eyes closed and he licked his lips.

“I save the best stuff I can get for my crew,” Shepard said with a touch of fondness in his voice. James noticed that Shepard had activated his omni-tool and was scrolling through a list on its holographic interface. He made a selection, and soft instrumental music began to filter in from the walls. The beat was reminiscent of the throbby electronica that had filled the nightclub, though somewhat more sedate. Some of James’s nervous tension began to ebb.

He reclined on the couch and took another sip of his tequila, savouring the heady sweetness of the powerful drink. He was buzzing harder already, which surprised him for a moment, but then it didn’t. This was potent shit. He’d gotten too used to the cheap stuff, the only kinds most places hadn’t run out of yet because it was legal to produce them and call them tequila on planets other than Earth.

“This is nice,” James said. He moved his head around to the beat of the music a bit. “Thanks for this, Loco. Man, I’ve missed having real tequila.”

“My pleasure,” Shepard replied. Steve leaned against him, eyes half-closed as he sipped his drink. “Glad to have you with us, Vega.”

“It _is_ good, isn’t it?” Steve commented, holding his snifter up to the light and staring into it meditatively. “Almost a different breed entirely from the stuff they make offworld.” He squinted. “How long were we at Purgatory?”

“Just a few hours,” Shepard said. “The night is young.”

Steve rolled his head around to look at Shepard and smiled. “ _Marvelous_ ,” he said, with such a simmering sexual undertone that James was entranced. Steve’s voice had always seemed to hit him in just the right spot, especially when they’d both been drinking.

Shepard, apparently, felt the same. He set his snifter down on the table and reached over to cup Steve’s jaw. He leaned in close, brushing their lips together.

“ _How_ are you so sexy?” he murmured.

“You bring out the best in me,” Steve replied, and they kissed. James watched the interplay of lips and tongues, feeling a lurking anxiety that he was intruding on a private moment but unable to help his fascinated arousal. It was almost like he could _see_ the spark of attraction between Shepard and Steve, drawing them together. His dick was already half-hard in his pants, and what he was watching did absolutely nothing to calm him down.

After a few moments Shepard drew back. He leaned his head back against the couch and closed his eyes with a dreamy smile, taking deep breaths as if trying to keep himself cool. Steve glanced over at James.

“Enjoying the view, Mr. Vega?” he said.

“I’d be lying if I said no,” James admitted. “But...”

Shepard opened his eyes and looked at him. Both of them waited for James to continue.

James opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to work out a way to say what he was thinking through the fog of drunkenness. He couldn’t deny his body was demanding he pounce on the both of them right now, give them what they wanted, and in doing so get what _he_ wanted. But a niggling question in the back of his mind refused to go unanswered, and finally he managed to put it into words.

“Are you guys... _sure_ about this?”

There was no need to clarify what he meant. Shepard and Steve exchanged a glance.

“We’re sure,” Steve said. “We wouldn’t have asked if we weren’t.”

“I guess not,” James agreed.

“Cold feet, Vega?” Shepard asked, watching him thoughtfully.

“No, it’s not that,” James said. “I just...” _What_? What did he just? Why couldn’t he talk? He was usually so smooth. He _always_ knew what to say, and how to inject it with just the right amount of sexy. But of the two men sharing this starship cabin with him, one of them was his best friend in the world and the other was his commanding officer, his mentor, a galactic icon and – yes, also a very good friend. This whole situation, while deeply attractive to him, also felt different somehow. More serious, like more was at stake. Perhaps it was because there _was_ more at stake.

“I realize this is a pretty serious violation of the anti-fraternization regs,” Shepard said. “If you’ve changed your mind, that’s perfectly fine. You’re under no obligation here... though I hope you’ll at least finish your drink.”

Steve nodded his agreement.

“I... well.” James fought for control of his tongue. “I do want to stay. I mean, I’m nervous as hell.” The idea was enough to make him chuckle. His father had made him nervous. _Collectors_ made him nervous. The very real possibility of the imminent doom of all advanced sapient life made him pretty damn nervous. But up to this point, making an idiot of himself in front of people he cared about had never really bothered him. Strange, when he thought about it, considering how often it happened.

“Why are you nervous?” Steve asked. He seemed to be thinking along the same lines, if the glint of mischief dancing in his eyes was any indication.

“I’m not really sure how _good_ I’ll be, for one thing,” James went on. “Sex with guys is not exactly my area of expertise. But... it’s mostly because you two are pretty important to me. I guess I just don’t want to come between you, or something.”

There. He’d said it, and it was only as he did that he really became aware of it himself. James knew he wasn’t into Steve romantically, but the friendship they shared was something deep and powerful, as vivid as anything he’d ever felt for another person. And Shepard – James liked and respected him, and he wanted Shepard to like and respect him in turn.

“James,” Steve said. James looked at him.

“We trust each other,” Steve said, indicating himself and Shepard. “We’re committed to each other. But these are stressful times we live in.”

Shepard and James both let out short, bitter laughs at the truth of that statement.

“We invited you up here because we like you, we think you’re hot, and we thought you might enjoy having some fun with us. In a manner of speaking... we _want_ you to ‘come between us.’”

He arched his eyebrows suggestively, and James couldn’t help laughing. Here was the good old smirky Steve with his playful innuendos James remembered from Fehl Prime all those years ago. A Reaper invasion was a strange time to feel almost giddy with happiness, but James couldn’t help the gladness he felt at having found his old friend – and furthermore, that his old friend had found Shepard. What might Steve have done, or _not_ done, if the Commander hadn’t pulled him out of his despair?

“Steve’s right,” Shepard said. “We’ve worked out the details of our relationship already. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“Well alright then,” James said. He couldn’t really argue with that – they knew themselves and each other better than he did, after all. He raised his glass. “To us.”

“To us,” Steve agreed, raising his own glass.

Shepard picked up his snifter from the table and followed suit. “To us.”

The three of them clinked their glasses together and drank. Rather than just take another sip, James gave in to his sense of adventure and downed the rest of his tequila. The liquor trailed a wonderfully smooth burn all the way down his throat, and he felt its warmth spreading throughout his body.

He lowered his glass just as Steve and Shepard were doing the same. Shepard set his down and picked up the bottle. He gave it a wiggle in James’s direction, asking with his eyes if he should pour any more.

“Later,” James laughed, belatedly noting that his voice had taken on a distinct purr. “I have any more, I might not remember what happens afterward.”

“Fair enough,” Shepard said, eyeing him up and down in a way that made James feel skillful and sexy. Shepard set the bottle down and stood up, heading over to a control panel on the wall to dim the lights a little. While he was doing that, Steve slid along the couch until he was next to James. He set his glass down on the table before turning and carefully climbing into James’s lap.

James let out a sharp exhalation as Steve settled onto his thighs and took hold of his head in both hands. The tent in his pants had grown, and he could almost feel another pulse of blood surging into his cock as Steve shifted his butt against him teasingly.

“Hey there, Esteban,” James said in a low voice, his hands moving unconsciously up Steve’s sides.

“Mr. Vega,” Steve whispered back, and kissed him.

As their lips met, Shepard switched the music playing on the stereo to a faster beat. Mixed in with the drums and the synthesized pitches and drones, James distinctly made out noises reminiscent of human breath. The subtle, intimate tone of the music boosted his confidence, and he pressed his tongue into Steve’s mouth. Steve responded in kind, moaning quietly against James’s lips. He tasted like tequila and spices. James had never been so turned on by a taste sensation before. He felt a pleasant lightheadedness welling up within him that had nothing to do with the alcohol, though the buzz certainly added elements of a reckless joyride to the kiss.

Steve’s mouth drifted sideways, trailing feathery kisses along his jaw and down his neck. James leaned his head back against the couch, enjoying the gentle, erotic touch of his friend’s lips and tongue. He massaged his fingers up and down Steve’s sides, testing the trim muscle beneath the tight synthetic fabric of his shirt. Steve squirmed between his hands, apparently liking it, so James kept it up.

In the course of his gentle exploration, Steve arrived at the hollow of James’s bared throat. He flicked the pulse jumping there with his tongue before planting his lips against James’s skin and starting to suck. James couldn’t help but snicker at the delightful, erotic tickle of Steve’s stubbly jaw. It was a sensation he hadn’t felt for many years, but the recollection of the last time he’d messed around with Steve came back to him all at once. He dropped his hands to Steve’s ass and squeezed hard.

“Esteban,” he said. “After all these years you still know my sweet spots. How is that fair?”

In response, Steve nipped at his skin in a line up his neck to his ear. “What, did you think I would forget?” he asked, his voice liquid smooth and feigning hurt. “I hope you haven’t forgotten mine.”

“Your guy can remind me where they are,” James said. He felt the couch shift as Shepard sat down next to them and leaned in close, sniffing along James’s shoulder. “Isn’t that right, Loco?”

He could almost feel Shepard smiling against his neck. The wet tongue that slipped up the skin behind his ear felt distinctly different from Steve’s – not entirely organic, but somehow not unnatural at all. Tiny flickers of something like static electricity danced along in its wake, eliciting a shiver from James. What was _that_ , and by god why did it turn him on so much? The combination of Steve on his lap, rubbing against him and kissing his neck, and Shepard doing whatever the hell he was doing on his other side had James rock hard in his pants.

He tried to ask Shepard how he was doing that, but the words were having trouble making it from his drunken, lust-fogged brain to his mouth. It didn’t bother him that much so long as Shepard would keep touching him, and in more places than just behind his ear. He didn’t need to ask – Shepard seemed uncannily able to tell just what he wanted, and obliged him without delay. He touched him again, this time on his arm. Tingling fingers smoothed down James’s forearm to his hand, covering it and nudging it lower.

“Rub him right... here,” Shepard said as he guided James’s hand to the small of Steve’s back. James worked his fingers down and around under the hem of Steve’s shirt so he could get at his skin, keeping his other arm wrapped around Steve’s back.

“Lower,” Shepard added, so James went lower, sliding his middle finger into the cleft of Steve’s butt.

“Mmm.” Steve twitched and giggled a little at the contact, rolling his hips forward in a way that rubbed deliciously against James’s dick. Even through his pants and underwear, the sudden increase in friction made him groan.

“ _There_ you go,” Shepard said with a hint of amusement. James snickered and gave Steve another few strokes, hardly able to believe that he was doing this with his best friend and his commanding officer and that it was hardly even awkward anymore – just intimate and hot.

Arms around James’s neck, Steve kept up a gentle grind against his dick, planting kisses here and there on the side of his face. Shepard leaned into him from the side, nosing around his ear and neck.

“You smell _good_ , Vega,” Shepard told him, his voice husky with lust.

James laughed. “Yeah? What’s that like, sweat and booze and gun oil?”

“Something like that,” Shepard said. “Stand up and take your shirt off.”

“That an order?” James quipped, shooting him a cocky sideways glance.

“If you want it to be,” Shepard replied without missing a beat.

“Oooh! Now isn’t _that_ an interesting idea.”

Steve straightened on his lap and ran his hands down James’s chest. “Careful, Mr. Vega,” he said teasingly. “You get Shepard into a mood where he wants to give orders... you better be ready to start following them.”

James moved his hands to Steve’s hips so he could slip his thumbs up under his shirt and stroke the skin of his waist. He found he missed the soft noises of pleasure Steve had been making just moments earlier. “Then it’s a good thing I think it’s high time some of these clothes came off, no?”

Steve smirked and backed off of him, standing up and moving out from between the couch and coffee table. Shepard drew back to give James room to stand up, which he did. He reached down to grab the hem of his shirt, but Shepard’s hand on his leg stopped him.

“Face me while you do it,” Shepard said. “I want to watch.”

James looked at him over his shoulder, and then glanced at Steve, who folded his arms and kept smirking. James shrugged and turned around.

“Now do it nice and slow,” Shepard said.

James chuckled. “Oh, I get it. You want a show, that right? Want to see some of my moves, Loco?”

“You going to show me, or do I have to come over there and take that shirt off you myself?”

James raised his hands in mock surrender. “Okay, okay. You just sit tight there and tell me if you like it.”

He hooked the fingers of one hand under his shirt and lifted it a little, revealing the rippled muscle of his abs. With his other hand, he traced a finger down through the sparse trail of hair below his belly button.

“Good,” Shepard said, one hand shifting lazily over to fondle the growing bulge in his pants. “Just like that, nice and slow. Give me a tease.”

“Comin’ right up,” James said, doing his best to sound seductive. He had only just realized he hadn’t stood up since drinking Shepard’s expensive tequila, and he was having a hard time keeping his balance. He dug his fingers under his belt and flexed his cock a few times, making his bulge move up and down. Shepard’s roving gaze paused there and he licked his lips, giving himself a generous squeeze.

James lifted his shirt higher, rubbing the palm of his hand not in his pants over his chest. He felt Steve’s presence moving up behind him, and a moment later his friend was pressing up against his back. James could feel the heat of Steve’s breath on his neck just before soft lips touched his skin. Steve slid his hands around his sides to his stomach, caressing his abs.

“Show him a little more, but only a little,” Steve whispered in his ear. “Shepard loves it when he can’t quite see what he’s going to get until right before he gets it.”

“Yeah?” James murmured back, turning his head towards Steve but keeping his gaze on Shepard. “Why shouldn’t I leave it on then, eh? Keep everything covered until it’s about to get good?”

“Don’t test me, Vega,” Shepard warned, but the way he was chewing his lip and rubbing his dick through his pants as he stared at James’s bared stomach rather muted the effect of his threat.

“I’d listen to him,” Steve said seriously. “It’s a fine line... you tease him _too_ much, and he’ll get bossy. Which can be a whole other kind of fun, but something tells me that’s not what charges your drive core, am I right?”

“Yeah,” James said with a snicker. “I’m cool with you guys saving that for a time I’m not around.”

Steve moved one of his hands up to James’s head, turning it so he could kiss the side of his mouth. At the same time he fluttered the fingers of his other hand up James’s side, tickling his ribs and his armpit. Giggling, James tried to squirm away and in the process stumbled to one side, nearly falling onto the coffee table. Steve righted him just in time, though it nearly cost him his own balance.

“Careful now,” Shepard said wryly.

“No tickling when I’m standing upright after drinking this much,” James said, trying to sound assertive even though Steve was still tickling his side and it was hard to check his urge to laugh.

“Alright,” Steve said, relenting. “Not when you’re standing upright.”

“Oooh, now you’re in for it, Vega,” Shepard said. “Should have worded that demand more carefully. Steve _loves_ to tickle.”

“I don’t mind being tickled,” James said. “Just not when it might make me fall down. Besides... you guys didn’t bring me up here so you could tickle me and watch me _not_ take my shirt off.”

“True,” Shepard agreed. “Get on with it, would you?”

Steve moved his hands back down James’s sides, allowing him to hike his shirt up as far as his armpits. He left his nipples covered, suspecting it would drive Shepard crazier than he was already. He ran his fingers along under the muscular ridge of one pec, and then upward under his bunched-up shirt. His hunch paid off when Shepard closed his eyes slowly and opened them again, growling his pleasure as his free hand fumbled with the catch on his belt.

“Good?” James asked smugly, knowing full well that it was good.

“Yes,” Shepard said, a little breathlessly. “Good, good. But take it off now. All the way.”

“You sure you don’t want to-”

“ _All the way_ ,” Shepard repeated, cutting him off.

“Better do as he says,” Steve said lightly, brushing his lips against James’s ear. He backed up, giving James space to maneuver. James tugged his shirt back down to his waist first, just to hear Shepard’s annoyed groan. Then, slowly, as gracefully as he could manage in his inebriated state, he pulled it back up and over his head.

“Good,” Shepard said again, voice smouldering, eyes wandering over James’s chest. “Nicely done, nicely done. Now give me that.” He nodded at the shirt in James’s hand.

“What?” James asked, baffled. “Why?”

“I said give me your _shirt_ , Vega.”

There was no arguing with Shepard when he used his Commander voice. Grinning, James shrugged. “Alright. Here you go.”

He tossed his sweat-damp shirt to Shepard, who caught it deftly. Shepard immediately buried his face in it, inhaling deeply and making low, throaty noises of apparent relish.

“ _Fuuuck_ , that’s hot,” he groaned. His hand tightened on his cock, though he seemed to be making an effort not to – saving himself, probably.

“I had no idea I smelled so good,” James remarked.

Shepard eyed him intently, his nose and lower face obscured by James’s shirt. The raw lust in his eyes was enough to kickstart James’s own libido back into high gear, and he reached down to give his dick a squeeze through his pants.

“Do that again,” Shepard said, lowering James’s shirt and setting it on the couch next to him.

“What?”

“Touch yourself. Squeeze your dick. Come on.”

James did so enthusiastically, wrapping his fingers around his erection as much as he could through the fabric of his pants. He gave himself a few tight strokes, biting his lip at the erotic feeling of it. Shepard watched raptly.

Steve came up behind him again and laid his chin on James’s shoulder. One hand snaked down to nudge his friend’s hand out of the way and replace it with his. Even though Steve couldn’t get much of a beat going through the fabric, his hand on James’s dick felt ten times better than his own. James stroked Steve’s wrist with his thumb and turned to nuzzle against his head, enjoying the attention.

“Esteban,” he said. “Take some clothes off, man.”

“Yes, do,” Shepard agreed, amused. “You know how often I’ve fantasized about having my favourite flyboy _and_ his beefy Marine buddy shirtless in my private quarters?”

“I’m guessing a lot,” James said. Shepard winked, which threw James off momentarily. He’d never seen Shepard wink at anybody before, let alone him.

“You want to do it for me?” Steve asked, and James glanced at him, wondering what he meant.

“Sure,” Shepard said. Steve backed up from James and raised his arms high, and Shepard held out his right hand, palm facing upward. As James watched, bewildered, Shepard made a sharp, twitchy gesture. Sparks of blue danced along his fingers, and James turned to see more biotic energy crawling over Steve’s shirt. A moment later, his confusion turned to delight as the Alliance-issue garment slipped biotically upwards, off Steve’s body, and twisted in the air above his head. Steve lowered his arms and his shirt hovered over to drop onto the couch next to the other.

James was laughing in amazement, hardly able to believe such a thing was possible. Before tonight, he hadn’t known the Shepard was capable of biotically lifting and moving an object lighter than a Cerberus guardian’s shield. Clearly, his talents extended beyond just snifters.

“Damn, Loco!” he exclaimed, impressed. “I knew you had a lot of power, but I had no idea you could be _precise_ , too.”

“Oh, he’s just getting started,” Steve said slyly, leaning forward with his thumbs hooked into his belt and managing to look effortlessly sexy in the process. “You just wait, Mr. Vega. We’re going to have all sorts of fun tonight.”

“Yeah?” James reached out and took Steve by his hips, pulling him close so they could kiss some more. Steve came willingly, moving his hands to James’s waist. Their second kiss was more heated, almost clumsy in their shared eagerness. This time it was Steve who pushed with his tongue, and James who let him in to explore. Steve’s skin felt vividly smooth against his – except for the alluring tickle of his chest hair, which grew across his pecs and in a tuft down his sternum. Kissing his best friend wasn’t something James had often thought about, but now that he knew what he’d been missing, he didn’t want to stop. The taste of his breath, the lazy interplay of their tongues – all of it provoked a rush of such intensity that it felt like an entirely new level of intoxication. Every pulse of his excited heartbeat seemed to make James’s dick grow harder in his pants.

He only came out of his contented basking when he felt warm hands up inside his boxer-briefs, teasing the skin of his thighs. Looking down, James realized Steve had unfastened his belt and pants without him even noticing, and was now sliding them down his thighs.

“Hehehe... tricky, Esteban,” James said, rubbing his nose against Steve’s chin. He felt like he was drunker on Steve than he was on tequila.

“You are kind of easy to trick,” Steve replied, so James nipped him on his lower lip.

“Vega. _Damn_.” Shepard appeared beside them and grabbed his thigh with both hands, one from the front and one from behind. James was keenly aware of the hardness in Shepard’s pants pressing against his hip. It might have been incredibly awkward if he hadn’t been so turned on already.

“What damn, Loco?”

“These _thighs_.” Shepard let out a lusty growl, staring down at one of the thighs in question as he caressed the firm muscle. “Fucking gorgeous.”

James cracked a grin, relishing a surge of cocky pride at Shepard’s interest in him. Feeling bold, he wrapped his arm around Shepard’s shoulders and leaned in for a kiss. Shepard responded with tongue and a purr, sliding one hand from his thigh up to his ass. He squeezed a few times, keeping up the low growl in the back of his throat.

James couldn’t help noticing that there were subtle differences in the way Shepard and Steve kissed. Steve was all about thorough, tonguey exploration of his mouth, slow and sensual. Shepard was more inclined to add some teeth, quicker with his tongue, more insistent with his lips. Both of them tasted of tequila, but while Steve’s mouth carried a hint of spiciness, Shepard’s tongue felt sweet. Even so, kissing Shepard was no less an aphrodisiac than kissing Steve. He could _feel_ how hard Shepard was, not just in the fabric-covered erection rubbing against his hip but in the dance of his tongue and the press of his fingers as well. The fact that he was kissing his superior officer barely entered his mind. Even when Shepard paused, pulling back a little as if to gauge his state of mind, James followed him. He wanted more, and Shepard obliged him. He had one arm around Steve, the other around Shepard, and both of them were hot, horny, and into him. _Why_ hadn’t he agreed to this sooner?

Eventually James broke the kiss to take a few breaths, and to give Steve room to kiss his boyfriend if he wanted. He did, and while watching the two of them making out was hot, it also caused some of his awkwardness to resurface. For a moment James wasn’t sure what to do, but then his eyes fell on Steve’s jaw shifting beneath his skin. He leaned down to get his mouth on Steve’s neck, remembering how hard it had made him when Steve did it to him. There was an incredibly sexy smell that lingered near Steve’s skin James found he couldn’t get enough of. It was partly a combination of sweat, deodorant, decontaminants, and the armoury where both of them spent so much time, but there was something else there too. James couldn’t identify it, but he found himself wondering if it was the same thing Shepard had been smelling in his shirt.

At some point, Shepard sidled around behind Steve and started kissing the other side of his neck. Steve leaned his head back blissfully, and James moved into position to get at his bared throat with his lips. Steve let out little murmurs of pleasure and encouragement, clearly enjoying all the attention he was receiving. He kept one hand around James’s side, tickling him lightly in the small of his back, and moved the other up his head to rub Shepard’s head affectionately.

Unable to help his grin, James laid his hands on Steve’s collarbone and raised his head to kiss him on the mouth again. He could feel Shepard’s hands moving around in between them, working on Steve’s belt. James slid his hands down Steve’s chest as they kissed, helping Shepard loosen his friend’s belt and undo his pants when he got there. The moment he had access, he slipped his hand in, running it over the taut fabric of Steve’s underwear and feeling the hardness beneath.

“Hey, Loco,” James said in between kissing Steve. “You gonna take some of those clothes off, or what?”

Shepard snorted, and his hands disappeared from in between the two of them. James lost track of him for a few moments as he moved around and out of his field of vision. A moment later the music changed from what James had begun to think of as the slow, breathy make-out track to a faster one, more like what had been playing in Purgatory.

“Here’s an idea,” James said as Steve trailed kisses up his jaw. “How about _you_ give _us_ a show, eh Loco?”

“Oh, he will,” Steve said amusedly. “Just be patient, James.”

James grabbed Steve by his shoulders and leaned down to bite him playfully on the collarbone. “Being patient is hard,” he growled.

A moment later, as he was kissing Steve’s throat and breathing in more of that intoxicating scent, James felt vibrations in his lips and tongue of his friend chuckling. He lifted his head to see Steve looking straight up. He followed Steve’s gaze, only to see Shepard hovering a meter above their heads, his entire body flaring with his biotic corona.

“Whoa!” James yelped, ducking instinctively and covering his head. A moment later, to the sound of Steve’s laughter, he peered out again, staring in disbelief. As was apparent from the smug look on Shepard’s face, he was thoroughly enjoying James’s astonishment.

“Something the matter, Vega?”

“Holy _shit_ ,” James said. “You can _float_ , too?!”

“It’s not hard,” Shepard said. “Most biotics can do it. You know that.”

“Well, sure, I’ve seen Doc do it,” James said, still staring up at the man hanging suspended above them. He straightened carefully, sure now that Shepard wasn’t about to come crashing down on his head. “Not you, though. I didn’t think you could. You’re more about throwing giant shockwaves and making things explode than... you know, being all graceful and shit.”

“Fair point, Shepard,” Steve commented.

“That’s true enough,” Shepard said. “My strengths are quite different from Liara’s. I doubt I’d be able to do this so easily on a planet... at least, not without making every unsecured object in the room float.”

“How come?” James asked curiously.

“A planetary gravity well is a hell of a lot deeper than the artificial grav-plane of the ship,” Shepard explained as he swam in a slow, vertically-aligned circle. “As you’ve noted – precision isn’t exactly my strong suit. I can hurl powerful forces around with no trouble, but something delicate and gentle like this... not so much.”

“Huh,” James said, fascinated and impressed. Shepard certainly behaved differently in combat than he did on the ship – James had noticed that the moment he’d first followed him into a firefight. He’d never before made the connection that their battles almost always took place planetside. He found himself wondering if Shepard’s sensitivity to dark energy and the curvature of spacetime had something to do with the wildly different dispositions he displayed on planets and aboard starships.

Shepard came out of his loop hanging upside-down, with his head towards the floor and his feet near the ceiling. He proceeded to remove his shirt in this position, head and arms disappearing into it and squirming around inside for several entertaining moments. Steve was laughing again, and the hero of the Milky Way looked so ridiculous fighting with his clothes while hanging upside-down in midair that James couldn’t help joining in. Finally Shepard struggled free, allowing his shirt to fall out of his biotic envelope and land on the floor.

“This is why I call you Loco,” James said. “One of the reasons.”

“You know the only reason he lets you call him that is because he _knows_ he’s crazy,” Steve said.

“That’s not true,” Shepard protested. “Or... it’s not only that, anyway.”

“No?” James asked, folding his arms and tilting his head in amusement. “Why else then?”

Shepard descended in a slow helix around them like some kind of bizarre, airborne version of the giant eel undulating about his aquarium. James couldn’t help but admire the impressive musculature of Shepard’s upper body, flexing carefully as he maintained his biotic field. “I like how the word rolls off your tongue,” he said in a soft, intimate voice right next to James’s ear.

“I’ll keep that in mind... Loco,” James replied. He felt a momentary tug on his ear by what felt like Shepard’s teeth, but when he turned his head, Shepard was already smiling archly and gliding away.

Steve headed over to the bed and sat down, then began to work on removing his boots. James realized that was probably a good idea; for one thing, his pants were around his knees, and he wouldn’t really be able to get them off with his boots still on. For another thing, his balance had suffered noticeably now that he had neither Shepard nor Steve to lean on.

The bed had surprisingly little give when he sat down next to Steve. “Huh,” James said, flexing his butt a little to bounce up and down experimentally.

“Harder than it looks, isn’t it?” Shepard said, rotating slowly in midair with his legs folded as he worked on his own boots. “I told you.”

“What do you know – I had it figured you were hoping I’d suggest to give it a test run when you said that,” James shot back.

Shepard made a passable attempt at looking scandalized as he passed overhead, though the effect was somewhat diminished seen upside-down. “Ridiculous,” he said. “I would _never_ suggest such a thing to a soldier under my command.”

At that, Steve started laughing and was unable to stop for several moments. He leaned against James, a boot in one hand and the other supporting his forehead.

“Your guy seems to think that’s bullshit, _Commander,_ ” James said smugly. A moment later he let out a surprised curse as the boot he’d just removed from his left foot flared blue and started to float towards the ceiling.

James rolled his eyes and looked up at Shepard, but before he could even locate him, his boot had tumbled through the air and bumped into his forehead. Shepard snickered.

“ _Loco_ ,” James said, shooting Shepard an aggrieved look as soon as he’d found him, hovering below the transparent ceiling port and the bright violet of the Serpent Nebula beyond it.

“I’m just havin’ fun with you, Vega,” Shepard said, utterly unrepentant.

“Yeah, yeah.” James knocked the floating boot away from his face and bent down to remove his other one. This time, thankfully, it stayed on the floor. Next to be removed were his socks; he stuffed them into the one boot he had access to, since the other was still spinning above the coffee table. He kicked his pants off, but left his boxer-briefs on, remembering what Steve had said about Shepard enjoying the tease of not seeing the best part until he got to touch it.

James stood up to stretch, but immediately almost fell over. Instinctively, he reached out to grab the nearest surface, which happened to be Steve’s head.

Steve turned out not to be a reliable means of support, as his giggling had renewed after Shepard’s antics with the boot, and he folded onto the bed under the pressure of James’s hand. That just made him laugh harder, but luckily the brief contact was enough for James to keep his balance. He stretched luxuriously, cracked his shoulders, and turned around. Steve had fallen onto his side, pants around his ankles, and was still trying to stifle his snickers as he looked up at Shepard. James watched him fondly for a moment, one hand sliding down to rub his dick through his underwear. Steve still hadn’t removed his other boot, so James got down on his knees to do it for him.

“Now _this_ is something I could get used to,” Steve remarked, straightening up somewhat and leaning on his hand. James gave him a sultry grin and leaned down to kiss Steve’s knee as he unlaced his boot.

“You ever want me to take your boots off for you, Esteban, you just ask.”

“Ever give a foot massage before, Vega?” Shepard asked from somewhere above him. “You’d be good at it.”

“What’s _that_ supposed to mean?” James asked, pretending to be offended.

“He means you’d look good doing it,” Steve said. His eyes were on James’s hands loosening his bootlaces, though he occasionally glanced past them to the not-so-subtle erection tenting his friend’s boxer-briefs.

James snorted. “I _always_ look good.” He popped Steve’s boot off, then tugged on his socks until they came off as well. Steve nudged him aside and finished removing his pants himself. He too kept his underwear on, and judging by the size of the bulge between his legs, he was enjoying the almost-nude hijinks as much as James was.

“Heads up,” Shepard said. James looked up in time to glimpse a pair of Alliance-issue cargo pants, evidently Shepard’s, before he was abruptly blinded by those same pants landing on his face.

“Whoops.” Shepard didn’t sound the least bit remorseful. Steve started giggling again.

“I don’t think you’re wearing those right, Mr. Vega.”

James put his hands on his hips and continued staring in the general direction he had last seen Shepard. “Loco,” he said in pained, though somewhat muffled voice. “It’s only funny until someone loses an eye.”

“Duly noted,” Shepard said. James rolled his eyes and tugged the pants off his head. He picked up his and Steve’s pants as well as Shepard’s dropped shirt before carrying it all over to the couch to add to the pile of discarded clothing. No sense messing up the Commander’s cabin.

When he next looked over at the bed, Shepard was hovering diagonally above it, head towards the floor. James’s eyes were drawn to Shepard’s thighs – not as large as his, but still powerfully muscled – disappearing enticingly behind his boxer-briefs. He had to admit, Shepard wasn’t entirely wrong with this teasing idea. The fact that all three of them were now stripped down to their underwear was almost more arousing to him than if they’d all been naked.

Steve was standing next to the bed, gazing up at Shepard with demure amusement in his eyes. Shepard extended a hand down to Steve, and he took it without hesitation. Shepard’s corona pulsed, expanding to envelop them both, and a moment later the pilot had joined his boyfriend in the air. James folded his arms and moistened his lips with his tongue, content for the moment to watch. It looked like fun, sure, but he didn’t know if he was ready for zero-g sexcapades just yet.

“You should give this a try,” Steve said to him as he darted upwards around Shepard. “It’s more relaxing than it looks.”

“Maybe,” James said noncommittally.

Steve rolled onto his back and coasted over to him, his hands and feet flickering with blue power. James wondered how either of them managed to move around in midair with nothing to push off of.

Steve arched down in front of him, extending his hands. James took the hint and reached up to take Steve’s hands, allowing his friend to pull himself downwards so their faces were level. Steve squeezed his hands and leaned in for a brief but fierce upside-down kiss. James chuckled as Steve slipped out of his grip, diving downwards and then back up, twisting to face James upright. He rose high enough to get his legs around James’s broad chest, taking his friend’s head in his hands and leaning down to run his nose along his mohawk. James responded by wrapping his arms around Steve and nuzzling against his stomach.

“Smell good, Esteban,” James murmured, enjoying the tickle against his face of the hair that grew down the furrow of Steve’s abs.

“Yeah?” Steve got a finger under James’s chin and tilted his head up, backing away slightly so he could lean in for another kiss.

“I’m yours to enjoy, Mr. Vega,” he said once their lips had parted. “ _If_ you can catch me.”

Laughing, he launched himself upwards out of James’s grip, arcing over to where Shepard was hovering near the ceiling. James let out a disappointed whine and dropped his hands.

“What are you waiting for, Vega?” Shepard asked as Steve rose behind him, snaking his hands around Shepard’s waist. “Jump.”

“How high?” James said flippantly.

Shepard extended a hand towards him. His biotic corona quivered, and James found himself abruptly knocked over from behind – but he didn’t hit the floor.

“Whooaaa!” James flailed around as he rose into the air, biotic energy licking at him along the length of his body. He made a grab for the coffee table, but it was only barely within his reach. Though he snagged it with his fingers, he soon lost his grip as he continued to ascend. All he had succeeded in doing was causing his legs and butt to rise rapidly higher than his shoulders. Nearly upside-down and totally disoriented, James started to worry that he’d hit his head against the wall. He kicked out behind him, intending to push himself into the middle of the room, but he misjudged the rate at which his body had been rotating. Closer to the wall than he’d expected, he hit it a lot harder than he’d meant to, and promptly went soaring across the room towards the bed.

“Ohhhhhhh crap, crap, _crap_!” James yelled. Steve and Shepard, both of them doubled over with laughter, somehow managed to part gracefully in time for James to zoom between them. James tried to catch Steve’s ankle as he passed, but missed by several centimeters. In the end, he was helpless to prevent himself from colliding with the wall above Shepard’s bed. He let out a loud _oof_ as he hit, ass first, curled into a ball to protect his head.

“Shepard,” Steve said, breathless with laughter, wiping tears from his eyes. “That was kind of mean.”

“Mean?” Shepard responded with exaggerated indignation. “ _I_ didn’t throw him into the wall. He did that all by himself!”

“You didn’t stop him, either,” Steve pointed out. Whimpering, James stuck out a hand and maneuvered himself around against the wall and ceiling so he could rub his sore butt.

“I suppose levitation really isn’t for everyone,” Shepard said, controlling himself enough to pull off a serious-Commander voice.

“When you said ‘have all sorts of fun,’” James mumbled, “I figured that meant you wanted to have sex in a bunch of different positions. Take turns being on top. Maybe, remove a few more items of clothing with biotics. Not... not... whatever the hell _this_ is. Ugh. This is just _painful._ ”

“But wildly entertaining,” Shepard said intensely, whereupon Steve broke into another fit of giggling.

 “All right,” Shepard said as James gave him a piteous, longsuffering look. “This can actually be pretty fun if you’re not bouncing off the walls. Come over here, into the middle of the room.”

He made a gesture. James felt a subtle push against his back, and he started to move towards Shepard and Steve. Shepard rolled his fingers upward, and James felt soft pads of force buoying him along in synch with the motion. He cracked a smile, enjoying the novel sensation of the biotic energy against his bare skin.

“Wave your hands through the field to pull yourself forward, as if you’re swimming,” Shepard instructed. “You can control your direction with the angle of your body.” He demonstrated by twisting his hands in a sculling motion and arching his back to trace another circle in the air.

James tried it, “swimming” in a wide, careful arc around Shepard and Steve. At this slower, more controlled speed, he found himself much more able to enjoy the levitation. Instead of the total and disorienting weightlessness – something Shepard routinely inflicted on enemies during combat – James began to get a sense of the gentle rise from beneath him that kept him aloft. Using trial and error and a driven by a drunken determination not to make any more a fool of himself than he had already, James managed to work out a reliable means of getting around.

While he got his bearings, Shepard and Steve kept near the ceiling, giving him space to experiment. The two of them were constantly moving around and pushing against each other, swimming like otters through the air. Steve seemed to enjoy darting around the ceiling while Shepard chased him, trying to keep up. Steve consistently evaded his grasp, though James couldn’t tell if it was because of Steve’s zero-g skills or because Shepard was letting him get away. They had evidently done this before, as not even the considerable volume of tequila Steve had downed at Purgatory appeared to have affected his lithe grace.

Once he’d determined how to stop himself from spinning crazily and face a constant direction, James turned himself onto his back and drifted. As soon as he kept relatively still, the corona died down. Only a few flickers here and there belied the force keeping all three men afloat. Sighing contentedly, James laced his fingers together behind his head and watched Shepard and Steve playing in the cabin’s heights.

Shepard caught up to Steve in the middle of the cabin right below the transparent port, having arched under him and risen again to grab him from below. Steve was still laughing, and Shepard wore a mischievous smirk on his face James had never seen before. He was struck by their obvious bond, this playful side to Shepard he apparently only revealed to his closest friends, and the changes it had induced in Steve since he’d lost Robert.

Steve tried to wriggle out from between Shepard’s arms, but Shepard grabbed him by his sides and pinned him against the ceiling. He planted a kiss in the middle of Steve’s chest as he pressed the rest of his body against Steve’s hips and thighs. Steve spread his arms with a breathy chuckle, his warm brown skin silhouetted dramatically against the brilliant Serpent Nebula and the lights of Kithoi Ward.

“Okay, now _this_ isn’t so bad,” James admitted. His eyes fell on Shepard’s butt, outlined teasingly by the fabric of his boxer-briefs.

“C’mon up here,” Steve said. Eager to rejoin the fun, James bent forward and pulled himself up through the air towards the other two. He ended in an upright position, standing in midair with his hands out to keep his balance and his head near Shepard’s ribs. This close, he could smell both of them, and _damn_ , but it made him want to touch.

“You ticklish, Loco?” James asked, leaning in to rub his nose against Shepard’s side. He hadn’t quite worked out how to get his lower half up into a horizontal position without moving forward at the same time, so he ended up running his nose up and around Shepard’s side to his back and shoulder as he drifted.

“Not there,” Shepard said, sounding quite pleased with himself. James grunted, annoyed but also a little turned on that Shepard and Steve knew how and where to touch _him_ to make him helpless. If he wanted to know where on their bodies he could touch to turn that back on them, he would have to discover them himself.

James stuck a hand out against the ceiling to slow his ascent, continuing in a crawl up Shepard’s back and then walking along the ceiling on his hands. Perhaps a slight provocation was in order.

“Man, this is fantastic,” he said, not-so-accidentally brushing his dick against Shepard’s shoulder as he passed. “I feel like Spiderman!”

He propelled himself forward and arched his spine, curling down and around to glide back across the room. Then he rolled to face upward, reaching out one hand ahead of him in case he was nearer the wall than he thought he was again. As he’d hoped, Shepard was following him, and Steve was curving down from the other direction.

Thinking he’d accomplished something by getting Shepard to come after him, James was thrown off when Shepard unexpectedly reached out and grabbed his leg, abruptly reversing his momentum. Shepard tugged himself forward, stopping James by his hips when he was about halfway up his body. He growled and buried his face in James’s groin, nuzzling his erection through his underwear.

Adrenaline surged through James at both the sensation and the sight of Shepard getting up close and personal with his dick. “Yeah, there you go,” he said softly, reaching out to rub Shepard’s head, encouraging him. Shepard nosed deeper and sniffed along the joint of James’s thigh, letting out a throaty groan of pleasure.

“So fucking good,” he said, his voice muffled.

Steve slowed alongside the two of them, smoothing his hand down James’s muscular arm as he passed. He transferred his fingers to James’s thigh, tickling the underside briefly before reaching the pit of his knee and caressing there. The motions of his fingers seemed to disturb the biotic field, making it rustle and tingle against James’s skin. It was a unique feeling, highly sensual and enjoyable, and he recognized it as the same thing he’d felt from Shepard’s tongue earlier. James extended his other hand to try to do the same thing to Steve, but his friend was soon out of reach, slipping down and around beneath them.

James looked back to Shepard, running his fingers over his buzzed scalp. He traced his thumb over the scar on Shepard’s forehead, and then down behind his ears as he surreptitiously searched for a ticklish spot. Shepard had moved upwards to trail tonguey, biting kisses over his abs, which was incredibly distracting but allowed James to reach lower down his arms and back. Shepard tensed as James’s fingers fluttered along the inside of his bicep, and for a moment he thought he’d found a sweet spot.

Shepard reacted first, sliding his hands rapidly up James’s sides and digging them into his armpits. James jerked away involuntarily, failing to suppress a giggle. His hands clamped down on Shepard’s forearms, trying to push him away, but Shepard hung on doggedly.

“Ah, yes,” Shepard said, somehow maintaining a calm expression and demeanour while James struggled to fend off his roving fingers. “James Vega, professional smartass and human tank, has a weakness... he’s ticklish.”

“Nooo!” James yelped, gasping for breath. “No tickling... stop it, stop it _stop_ it!”

Shepard, now grinning wickedly, didn’t stop. At the same time, James felt a second pair of hands curving around his abs, and then Steve’s tongue licking a long, tingling trail up his spine. He laughed and squirmed, his efforts to dislodge Shepard’s fingers from his armpits weakened by the intense sensations that seemed to ripple throughout his body.

“Aaaagghhhh!” James exerted all his considerable strength against Shepard’s arms, finally managing to force them down and away from his armpits. Unfortunately, Shepard turned the tables on him yet again by gripping him right back, preventing him from intervening as Steve immediately went for the now-exposed vulnerable areas.

“Two against one, two against one, not fair!” James cried, tears of laughter streaming down his face. “Not fair! Please! _Please_! Mercy, mercy goddamnit!”

Laughing in a somewhat more controlled manner, Steve relented. He moved his hands up to James’s chest, giving the hard muscle of his pecs a few fond squeezes. “Let’s give him a break, Shepard,” he said.

“I’m gonna break _you_ ,” James gasped, but he was happy enough to curl into a ball with his arms clamped at his sides while he recovered his breath.

“Now I know why you like tickling me so much,” Shepard said, arcing above James to join Steve.

“Well, it’s also because you’re pretty much impossible to immobilize any other way,” Steve replied. He reached up to get his hands on Shepard’s face, and they shared a midair kiss. James watched them surreptitiously out of the corner of his eye, plotting revenge.

“You prefer me immobilized, do you?” Shepard murmured against Steve’s lips, eyes contentedly half-closed.

“I don’t know if I _prefer_ it,” Steve said. “But you can’t deny that all sorts of interesting and exciting things happen when I can get you to keep still.”

As they kissed again and their slow midair rotation turned Shepard’s face away from James, Steve opened his eyes. James stared at him hard, trying to telepathically communicate his intent and secure a temporary alliance. He made sure to glance pointedly several times in the direction of Shepard’s armpits. Steve’s eyes reflected a subtle amusement that seemed to indicate he knew what James was up to, but he offered no other encouragement.

_The hell with it_ , James thought. _I’m going in_.

He moved forward stealthily, extending his hands in preparation to grab Shepard by his sides and hopefully tickle some respect into him. Steve continued kissing Shepard, making no indication that James was approaching, which he took as a good sign.

His fingers were a few decimeters away from Shepard’s skin when Shepard spoke without turning around. “Not trying to sneak up on me, are you, Vega?”

James froze. It was only then that he saw the tiny blue coronae flickering around his fingers. No doubt Shepard, who was maintaining the mass-neutralizing field, could sense even tiny distortions this close to his body. _Damn it._

“Nnnope,” James hedged, withdrawing his hands as Shepard turned around to face him. “Just... checkin’ you out, Loco. Your delts are seriously hot.” He reached out to take Shepard by his shoulders, giving the muscles in question a few caresses and letting out a deep purr. Shepard watched him with amusement, one eyebrow arched dubiously, while Steve snickered silently behind him.

“You’re pretty fit for a biotic,” James went on, running his fingers down Shepard’s biceps. Tendrils of blue power wavered in their wake.

“What, biotics can’t be fit?”

“Sure they can, but it’s less important for combat efficiency than it is for a guns-blazing grunt like me,” James said. “You ever fired a Claymore?”

“No,” Shepard said. “But I’ve fired a Widow, and scored a perfect headshot with it at eleven hundred meters.”

James’s eyes widened, and for a moment he forgot all about trying to get his fingers into place to exact his vengeance. “You serious? Eleven hundred meters?”

“Of course.”

James whistled, genuinely impressed. “Damn. Guess that’s why you’re the Spectre.”

Steve leaned in to brush his lips along Shepard’s neck from behind. “You should bring him to the firing range on the Citadel sometime, Shepard,” he said. “Show off some of your skills that don’t involve levitation or singularities.”

James met his eyes over Shepard’s shoulder, and Steve glanced downward once. James flicked his gaze in that direction, noticing with a surge of excitement that Steve had his hands around Shepard’s wrists.

“You know, maybe I will,” Shepard was saying. “I bet there’s a few tricks you and I could show each other, Vega. I’ve been thinking about carrying a shotgun-”

James lunged forward, hands darting out to get at Shepard’s armpits. Shepard reacted so fast it must have been on instinct, rebuffing James’s hands with a powerful barrier. Steve came to the rescue, tugging Shepard’s arms behind his back, and James pressed his advantage. He powered through the barrier with brute force, shoved his fingers into Shepard’s armpits and tickled mercilessly. Shepard’s startled grunt became a stifled chuckle which soon dissolved into full-blown laughter.

“Shotgun, motherfucker!” James yelled triumphantly.

“Traitors,” Shepard bit out around his laughter, desperately struggling to free his hands from Steve’s grip and squirm away from James’s fingers at the same time. Steve was laughing too, barely keeping Shepard’s wrists together. James dug in relentlessly while he could, keenly aware that Shepard could hurl him across the room at any time but also feeling a strange, rapturous and very drunken elation at his victory. He’d cracked the Commander’s shell at last: Shepard, normally so reserved and imperturbable outside of combat, was blinking away tears, laughing as hard as anyone ever had.

“ _Nobody_ tickles James Vega and gets away with it,” James said with a decisive grin.

“Alright, you son of a bitch,” Shepard gasped. “Bring it on.”

He lurched forward, releasing a minor biotic shockwave that knocked James backwards and dislodged his fingers from their target. Steve immediately let go of Shepard’s wrists and darted away, nimbly evading a second blast aimed at him. Shepard let him go, turning back to James and raising one hand towards him. Bright energy spasmed around his clenched fist.

James raised his hands in preparation for... what, he didn’t know, but he did not like the ominous smirk on Shepard’s face one bit. “Hey now, Loco,” he said placatingly. “It’s just fun... we’re all buddies here.”

Baring his teeth in amusement, Shepard twisted his wrist. A warp field coalesced around James’s entire body, but his instinctive terror that he was about to be shredded at the molecular level was unfounded. The field wasn’t painful at all – on the contrary, it was more like a full-body tickle, more pleasurable than anything he’d felt in his life but intense to the point of debilitation.

“Aaaahhhh!” James writhed in midair above Shepard’s bed, frantically pawing at himself in a futile effort to escape the field. He could hardly deny he liked it – especially the riotous tingling that raced up and down the shaft of his dick. But it was far too much all at once. He could barely breathe through his laughter, couldn’t move at all except to thrash.

“Uncle!” he managed. “Uncle, you bastard! You win!”

Shepard approached him carefully, not letting up on the biotic field. “ _Who_ tickles James Vega and gets away with it?” he said.

James resisted answering for a few moments longer. He tried to growl defiantly, but the only sound he could produce was more of a gurgle.

“Come on, _Jimmy_ ,” Shepard said softly, twitching his fist to intensify the warp by a fractional degree. “Who’s in charge here? Eh?”

“You!” James grunted. “ _You_ are, you fucker.”

Shepard opened his fist, and to James’s immense relief, the warp field dissipated at last. Ironically, he found he missed the excruciating pleasure almost as soon as it was gone.

It took James a minute or two to catch his breath. His mind, too, was thoroughly scrambled. Who knew biotics could be used for such a thing? Now he understood all those enigmatic references Steve had made to “other uses” of dark energy manipulation. He found himself wondering if Liara knew how to do what Shepard had just done.

Eventually, when James opened his eyes, he realized he was no longer afloat, but lying on Shepard’s bed. Shepard and Steve were still frisking in the air above him, twining around each other and exchanging brief, teasing kisses wherever they could reach.

“You good, Mr. Vega?” Steve asked slyly, seeing him watching them.

James blinked a few times, trying to remember how to make his mouth work. “Wow,” he said eventually. Shepard and Steve both laughed lightly.

“Going to behave?” Shepard said, descending diagonally until his shoulders and head were close enough for James to reach up and touch.

“Going to do that again if I don’t?” James shot back.

He tensed as Shepard trailed a single finger down his chest, igniting a brief but powerful tingle along his skin. It felt good, much more bearable when it was only over a small part of his body. James couldn’t help a little groan of pleasure.

“You sure you don’t _want_ me to?” Shepard’s eyes roved downward, and he smirked. James looked down, realizing there was a noticeable stain of precome on his boxer-briefs. He remembered how Shepard’s full-body tickle field had felt on his dick, and he shivered as the desire for more echoed through him. He was still rock hard, and it was long past time he’d gotten some relief. He looked up again, his eyes meeting Shepard’s, this time returning the lustful gaze with interest.

Shepard nodded. “Thought so.”

“Enough with the messing around,” James said, sitting up and forcing Shepard to retreat a little. “Let’s have some _real_ fun.”


	2. Chapter 2

James reclined onto the bed, beckoning Shepard with a finger to come down out of the air. Shepard straightened into a kneeling position, holding it as he slowly lowered himself onto the bed to straddle James’s shins. He leaned over him, sniffing along James’s waist just above his boxer-briefs. Meanwhile, Steve settled onto the bed beside them, lying alongside James and trailing a sensual finger up his arm. James shifted his arm to wrap it around Steve, pulling him closer to plant a kiss on his shoulder. Steve returned the gesture, getting his left arm around James’s shoulders and nosing against his mohawk.

Shepard’s fingers were slipping into the waistband of his underwear and tugging them down almost before the reality of the situation sunk in. James watched him avidly, his heart suddenly beating a lot faster as his uncertainty resurfaced with a vengeance. This was _so_ against regulations. It should have been a bad thing, but it felt way, way too good for him to even be able to think about putting a stop to it. The banter, the random floating, even the fact of his inability to out-tickle Shepard – all of it made him feel giddy and alive in a way he couldn’t ever remember feeling before.

“Vega,” Shepard said, sounding aggravated. “You want to give me a hand here?”

“Huh?” James blinked, belatedly realizing that Shepard was trying to remove his underwear, but couldn’t because his ass was lying against the bed. “Oh – sure. Sorry, Loco.”

He lifted his hips, and Shepard finally tugged his underwear down to his knees. His cock slapped upward immediately, drooling precome after a long period of arousal with no stimulation. The feeling of it made James twitch a little. In some ways, his body was still reeling from Shepard’s warp field. All his nerves felt more sensitive than they normally did, eager to fire more bursts of pleasure into his brain.

“Nice,” Steve whispered, eyes on his dick. James grinned.

“Like what you see, Esteban?”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Nothing I haven’t seen before,” he replied, but he was smiling too. He slid his free hand down his stomach and over the bulge in his boxer-briefs, giving himself a few squeezes. James’s gaze darted back to his dick when he felt Shepard’s hand wrapping around it, lifting it off his stomach. Shepard leaned down, eyes boring into his, and ran his tongue up the underside of his shaft.

James took a deep, careful breath. He’d had his dick in another man’s mouth perhaps three times in his life. All of those times he’d been very drunk – much more so than he was even now. As such, his memories of what it was like, or if it was even any different from head given by a woman, were hazy at best. He was suddenly glad he hadn’t drunk more. He wanted to remember tonight.

Shepard smiled with his tongue out, swirling it over the head of his dick. James let out a strangled noise at the sensation.

“This is _loco_ ,” he said. It was, too. That was his commanding officer, licking his dick. Staring at him. Planting a kiss just under the head... opening his mouth like he was about to-

Then he did, and James didn’t care anymore that Shepard was a superior officer and that they were violating several regs pretty hard. Shepard’s mouth was warm and moist and so _smooth_ sliding down his dick, his tongue never still, his eyes alive with mischief. James thought he would surely have to stop at some point, but Shepard kept going, all the way down until his mouth was as full as it could be and his nose was buried in wiry hair.

“Ho-lee _shit_ ,” James breathed. Shepard’s thumbs gently stroked his hips. Slowly, maddeningly, he began to draw back up. James ran his free hand over the top of Shepard’s head, feeling the shape of his skull beneath the coarse stubble. He wanted rather badly to push Shepard’s head back down on his dick, to feel that warmth all the way to the base again, but the very idea induced a paradoxical fear alongside his desire. What Marine would ever dare to face-fuck a superior officer?

James knew the answer to that one. He would, in a heartbeat, if he thought he could get away with it. As it was, he was more afraid of Shepard’s reaction than he was eager to get his rocks off. Not to mention the fact that Shepard’s boyfriend was right there next to him, watching. Touching himself in a way that indicated he was also enjoying the performance... but still.

Lucky for James, Shepard was also interested in getting his rocks off. He paused with just the head of James’s dick in his mouth, repeatedly licking the underside. Like Steve, he seemed to be deeply enjoying the startled quality to James’s gasps. After a few moments, he started back down.

“Goddamn, Loco,” James panted. “You’re pretty good at this.”

“Surprised?” Steve asked amusedly.

“A little,” James said. “Who’d have thought the Saviour of the Citadel, Commander Badass Hero of the Milky Way, would have a talent for sucking dick?”

Shepard drew back up from about two-thirds of the way down James’s dick, disappointing him. The head of his dick popped out of Shepard’s mouth with a noise that almost made him laugh.

“Who says it’s a talent?” Shepard said, replacing his mouth with a hand and starting a slow, steady stroke. The sharp edge to his tone might have convinced James he really was offended if not for the smug grin on his face. “Maybe I can tell just by looking at you what flips your switches, Vega.”

“Sure, sure,” James said, watching Shepard’s hand on his dick. The sight was almost as mesmerizing as the feeling of those calloused fingers sliding up and down. “Whatever you say. So long as you don’t stop doing-” He cut himself off with a groan as Shepard engulfed him in his mouth once more. “That. _Madre._ ”

Shepard sealed his lips and sucked as he drew back up, laving his tongue back and forth. James started rubbing him on his ear, partly out of affection and partly to stop himself from shoving Shepard’s head all the way down. Shepard may have been right about one thing – he certainly seemed aware of what James wanted. He took it to the base again and spent a few moments there, swirling the dick in his mouth around in a way that had James sighing at a rather higher pitch than his usual voice.

Beside them, Steve had a hand in his boxer-briefs and was stroking himself with a carefully slow rhythm, chewing his lower lip as he watched James’s face. Noticing his attention, James met his gaze and smiled, too caught up in what Shepard was doing to him to form any words. As it turned out, Steve wasn’t interested in talking either. He covered James’s smile with a hungry kiss, tongue pushing forward with lustful urgency.

James couldn’t help giggling a little as he pushed back with his own tongue. He was kissing one guy while another one sucked him off. It was one of the stranger situations he’d ever found himself in. Incredible and maddeningly hot, but crazy.

Steve was trying to work his cock out of his boxer-briefs one-handed, so James reached down to help him out. He slipped his fingers down Steve’s waist and into his underwear, nudging his friend’s hand out of the way. He found Steve’s dick, stiff with blood and pressing back against his stomach. James mentally worked his way past the unfamiliar sensation of holding another guy’s erection in hand, trying to think instead of what of what it was he liked to do to himself and duplicating it for Steve. He pressed his fingers teasingly along Steve’s length to the base, then took his balls in hand and massaged them gently. He managed it all while still fending off Steve’s eager tongue with his own. At Steve’s sharp inhalation, James felt a little burst of smug pride.

“Adventurous, Mr. Vega,” Steve whispered against his lips.

“You know me, Esteban,” James purred. “I like to keep you on your toes.”

He drew his hand up enough to hook his thumb around the waist of Steve’s underwear and tugged them down. Steve helped him with his free hand and some creative wriggling. His dick popped free, ready for some manual attention, and James got right to it.

Now, this... Shepard hadn’t let up on his dick at all, and with his hand around Steve and feeling him tense as he started to stroke, James found himself more turned on that ever. _This_ was hot. He’d never imagined he could feel so sexy before, at least not without a woman present.

James removed his hand just long enough to spit on his palm and spread his saliva as makeshift lubricant up and down Steve’s shaft. He resumed his motion, which was now much smoother. Steve shifted his hips against James’s hand, letting out little pleased grunts from deep in his chest. James gave him a few good squeezes on the upstroke, following each pass with a firm rub of his palm against the head of Steve’s dick. Eyes on his fist, James listened for a change in Steve’s response, smirking when he was rewarded with a gasp and a quiet moan.

Shepard had been watching him, as much as he was able to while bobbing up and down on James’s dick. When James next met his gaze, Shepard pulled off him and gave him a smouldering look, replacing his mouth with his hand.

“That’s a well-practiced stroke, Vega,” Shepard said teasingly, glancing pointedly at James’s hand on Steve’s dick.

“And what are you doing right now, _Loco_?” James shot back. “Feels just as good as when I do it myself. So what if I’ve gotten proficient at wanking over the years? So have you, obviously. No chance to get any relief serving on a ship... well, in peacetime-” at which both Shepard and Steve snorted their amusement “-and a guy’s got needs.”

“So give yourself a _hand_ with your own _needs_ for a few minutes, would you?” Shepard said. “Steve wants a turn.” He shifted himself sideways on the bed and took James’s wrist in his hand, pinching him until he let go of Steve. He licked a long, sensual trail up Steve’s dick and swirled his tongue around the head. Steve’s shoulders twitched a little and he stared into Shepard’s eyes, lips parted slightly. The corners of his mouth were quirked up in a stifled smile. He knew as well as the other two that he hadn’t asked for a turn – Shepard had just decided to give him one. Shepard waggled his eyebrows, a suggestive gleam in his eyes, and proceeded to go down on Steve in one long, smooth motion.

“Oh, my god,” Steve said huskily. “Shepard...”

James couldn’t help being disappointed that Shepard’s skillful tongue had moved elsewhere, but he didn’t want to deny Steve feeling what he was feeling – what James himself had experienced moments earlier as deeply pleasurable. And Shepard was Steve’s boyfriend, after all, not his. Damn, but the sexual politics of threesomes were confusing. James was just glad that he hadn’t yet done or said anything totally inappropriate, something that might ruin his chances of ever being invited back.

He shifted his left hand over to his dick, picking up where Shepard had left off while he watched. James had never before even conceived of being turned on by watching a guy suck off another guy – all the porn he watched involved at least one lady, human or alien. Still, maybe it was the tequila, but he was oddly mesmerized and indisputably aroused by the sight of Shepard doing his thing up and down Steve’s dick. He watched the veiny ridges of shiny brown cock disappearing and reappearing behind those soft lips, lips covered by Shepard’s meticulously-maintained stubble. He matched the pace with his own hand. His dick still gleamed with moisture from Shepard’s mouth, and all he had to do was slide his hand up and down. It felt incredible.

“He do this for you a lot, Esteban?” James asked in a low voice, lips brushing against Steve’s ear. “Looks like he’s enjoying himself.”

Shepard, to his credit, offered no response that required him to stop what he was doing. He merely shot James a sly look that held a promise of comeuppance. A few hours ago, such a look might have made James nervous; now that he knew how playful and mischievous Shepard was in the bedroom, it instead stirred a little thrill of anticipation along his spine.

“Often enough to keep me happy,” Steve joked. His voice hitched as Shepard went all the way down on him like he’d done to James. “This... isn’t exactly his _favourite_ part, but I do think he enjoys... mmm... _drawing it out_.” He spoke the last three words with a lusty growl in his voice as Shepard rolled his head around, massaging Steve’s dick with his throat.

“See the way he’s – looking at me, now?” Steve went on breathlessly. “He wants me to beg.”

“ _Beg_? For what?” James laughed incredulously. “Him not to stop?”

Shepard reached over with his right hand and started fingering James’s dick, trying to dislodge his grip. James let him do it, curious and still confused but sensing the practical demonstration of an answer was imminent. Shepard started stroking him at the same pace he was blowing Steve. One of his fingers twitched a little.

“Oh, here we go,” Steve said. “You asked for it, Mr. Vega...”

“What are you even – ohhh, shit!” James cut himself off with a groan as Shepard induced a tiny, buzzing warp field all along the length of his dick. It tingled and pulsed energetically, like a thousand soft touches from every single direction at once. He shoved his hips against Shepard’s hand on pure instinct, clenching his free hand into a fist and squeezing Steve’s shoulder with his other. Nerves from his thighs to his abs fired off riotously, intensifying the pleasurable sensations. And unlike the first time Shepard had done this, when the field had covered James’s whole body, it wasn’t so extreme as to be almost painful. It was just wildly, powerfully _good_. He could feel the tingle reaching into the core of his body, stimulating the base of his dick far deeper than he’d known it could go.

Then it stopped. James came crashing back down to reality, unable to stop himself from taking several inelegant gasps for breath. Shepard smirked around Steve’s dick, having never stopped what he was doing, and Steve chuckled.

“And _that’s_ what he wants me to beg for,” he said.

James swore creatively. “Damn it, _damn_ it, Loco, you... you and your nutty brain powers! I’m _aaalmost_ tempted to say once was enough for me... but I’m not gonna beg. I’m _not_.”

“I don’t expect you to beg,” Shepard said, after popping Steve’s dick out of his mouth. The clench of his hand around James’s dick felt seriously lackluster in comparison to what he’d just experienced, but he was still glad Shepard hadn’t stopped stroking him. “Not yet, anyway. If you want some more, you can just ask... we’ll work up to begging later.”

Steve was still trying to stifle his amusement, apparently at the expression on James’s face. James put on what he hoped was an adorable mock scowl and silenced his friend’s giggling with a fierce kiss. He really wanted to take Shepard up on his offer and get some more of that tingling warp while it was free, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that if he asked, Shepard would... win, somehow. He’d take what he was given, but he wouldn’t give either of them the satisfaction of showing how much he wanted more.

“You guys,” James mumbled as Steve broke their kiss. “You keep pulling out all these loco tricks... Don’t you ever just fuck like normal people?”

“Who wants to be normal?” Steve countered.

“Especially when being loco is so much more _fun_ ,” Shepard added. James looked at him, and the somber, serious expression on Shepard’s face – coupled with the fact that he had a hard dick in each hand and was still keeping up a steady stroke – finally broke through his resistance. He laughed, squeezing Steve’s shoulder and reaching out to rub Shepard’s wrist affectionately.

“Fine,” James said. “Let’s see what else you got.”

Shepard wasted no time getting right back into sucking him off. With the fingers of one hand twitching against the bed, tendrils of biotic energy danced from his tongue as he flicked it against James’s dick. Each spark sent what felt like a burst of heat down the core of his shaft, and the sensations went from unusually good to downright mind-blowing when Shepard added the rest of his mouth and throat to the effort. Once again Shepard took James’s dick as deep as he could, all the way to the base, and hung out there for a while, grinding around and releasing little static bursts of pleasure into James’s body.

Too distracted by the amazing blowjob he was receiving, James didn’t notice at first that Steve was moving around next to him, shifting his position. He felt Steve’s arm withdraw from around his shoulders, and the weight of his friend on his own arm disappeared a moment later. James only opened his eyes (and closed his mouth, which had been hanging open) when he felt a warm tongue sliding over his hip. He glanced down, surprised to see Steve leaning forward on his arms next to Shepard, smirking up at him as he closed his lips against his skin. James jerked a little when he felt Steve bite him – gently and playfully, but it was still a vivid, novel sensation. He’d been bitten in a sexy way before, but never by a dude. He liked it.

“What are you doin’ down there, Esteban?” James said, a little hoarsely since Shepard was still calmly and lovingly sucking him off. “Gettin’ frisky?”

Shepard drew back off of him and took a few much-needed breaths, wiping his mouth his thumb. “I think we’re long past ‘frisky’ at this point, don’t you?” he said, and James grinned.

“Oh, I dunno,” Steve said silkily, tilting his head to look at Shepard out of the corner of his eye. “I think we could get friskier. What do you think, Shepard?”

“I think you should kiss me,” Shepard said.

Steve shot a sly glance at James, and then leaned in to kiss Shepard as requested. He didn’t seem to care, or perhaps it was his intention, that the head of James’s dick was caught in between their lips as they connected.

Suddenly there wasn’t just one mouth stimulating the most sensitive part of his body, but two. James stared at them, mouth dry and hanging open dumbly. Of all the numerous and uncertain expectations he’d had for what might go on in this room, two guys kissing around the head of his dick had never been among them. He was sufficiently taken aback as to be momentarily unable to make any noise at all. Then he registered the sensations of biotic power curling around under the ridge of his glans, and two smooth, wet tongues on top of that, and his lungs and vocal cords seemed to react without conscious effort on his part.

It took him a few more moments for James to recover control of his voice. “That feels fuckin’ good,” he groaned.

Shepard and Steve parted a moment later, though Shepard kept swirling his tongue around and around the head of James’s dick, while Steve moved lower down the shaft with his. They started taking turns, alternating who was doing what every few seconds. Both of them kept shooting smug, deeply sexy looks at James, obviously enjoying his expression and the noises he was making. James couldn’t help a choking giggle at the sight. The sheer improbable uniqueness of the situation he was in kept sneaking up on him, startling him all over again. Commander Shepard, the Spectre, and Steve Cortez, his best friend, were sucking him off. Of their own free will. At the same time. And they were _good_ at it.

“You guys are totally nuts, you know that?” James remarked.

“But you like it,” Shepard said. His tone of voice made it clear that he wasn’t asking a question so much as stating a fact.

“Damn right I do.”

“Speaking of nuts,” Steve said conversationally. He ducked his head down under Shepard’s and proceeded to wrap his lips around one of James’s balls. At the same time, Shepard went down on him again, almost all the way to the base. He lifted his head, looking James straight in the eye as he rubbed his cock against the roof of his mouth.

“Nnnngh!” James was breathing as hard as if he’d just finished a marathon workout session. His fists clenched against the bed, grabbing handfuls of the sheet. “ _Dios_! Did you guys _practice_ this or something?”

Shepard didn’t respond except to smirk around James’s dick as he continued doing what he was doing. Below him, Steve was giving his balls a gentle massage with his lips and tongue. The combination was glorious, especially when coupled with the feeling of Steve’s fuzzy Alliance-regulation buzz cut rubbing against his thigh.

As good as it was James couldn’t help wondering in a cooler part of his brain why _he_ was getting all the attention. Sooner or later, surely, Shepard would want something for himself. James would have happily given it his best shot, but if the other two were content for the moment giving him this wacky double blowjob, he certainly wasn’t going to argue. Shifting on his back to make himself a little more comfortable, James folded his hands behind his head and watched them with a cocky grin.

He’d received some pretty fantastic blowjobs in his time, and Shepard’s was certainly right up there in his top five. Maybe top three, even. But it was the addition of a second mouth – and the skilled, affectionate dude behind it – that made this one truly stand out. Steve knew just how much pressure was too much, and while he was careful not to be too rough, he toed the line constantly. His lips were soft and silky smooth. The gentle pressure and tugging would have been enough to make James gasp and jerk even had Shepard not been bobbing up and down his length at the same time. As it was, when Steve decided to take both of his balls into his mouth at once and start sucking on them, James barely kept himself from sitting bolt upright. Steve noticed his sudden tension, and drew back a little.

“Too hard?” he asked, his voice somewhat muffled due to the position of his head between James’s meaty thighs.

“No, man,” James grunted. “Well, almost... aaalllmost. But not quite. You guys are both amazing. Fucking _amazing._ ”

Shepard pulled off his dick with a kind of satisfied _pop_ , shooting James a self-satisfied smirk. A bead of precome promptly bloomed at the tip of his dick. Shepard licked it up, and then proceeded down his shaft, nudging Steve out of the way with his head.

“Let me see what _I_ can do,” he murmured.

Steve grinned and backed up a little, shifting his arms around to raise himself higher. He took Shepard’s place on James’s dick, wrapping his lips around the head and starting to descend.

“Mmhmm. Eh, Esteba-” James cut himself off with a moan when Shepard’s crazy biotic tongue suddenly swept across his balls. Jolts of static jumped into him, making him alternately tense and relax across his midriff. “Ahh! Shit!”

“Good?” Shepard asked from somewhere between his legs.

“Yes!” James gasped, gripping the sheets so hard his knuckles were pale. “ _Fuck_ , yes!” While he could muster the self-control, he added, “You might want to back off for a bit... seriously. I’m gonna blow soon if you keep this up.”

Shepard snorted and raised his head. “That’s kind of the idea, Vega.”

Steve pulled off and shot him an amused look, one eyebrow arched. “You know you can just say the word if you want to stop,” he said, apparently hoping for an incredulous snort, but James wasn’t listening. He was watching Steve’s lips, with their barely-visible glimmer of precome. The fact that it was _his_ , on his best friend’s mouth, pulsed a sense of arousal through his body that seemed to hit him just right.

“Get over here,” James growled, reaching down and trying to pull Steve closer by his upper arm. Steve crawled up his body, a little clumsily due to James’s insistent tugging on his bicep. As soon as he could reach, James grabbed Steve’s head and gave him a thorough kiss. Meanwhile, despite what he’d said, Shepard seemed to have accepted James’s request that he tone down the stimulation for the time being; he was now affectionately stroking the prominent veins of James’s hip, following each caress with his lips.

Belatedly, James realized that the salty taste on Steve’s tongue was from his own precome. His mind stuttered a little at the thought, but after a moment’s consideration it hardly seemed worth getting weirded out over. He’d gone down on women before and gotten a literal taste of their arousal, after all. Anyone who voluntarily took an erect dick into their mouth was going to get some fluids in there too. If Shepard and Steve were willing, why shouldn’t he be?

Besides, James mused as he enjoyed the swirl of Steve’s tongue against his, it wasn’t like it tasted _bad_ , exactly...

He was struck by a sudden, bizarre urge to get a fuller taste of himself. As soon as Steve’s lips parted from his, James reached down and grabbed Shepard by his shoulder. “Now you,” he said. “C’mere.”

Shepard smirked and crawled up James’s body, nosing up the skin of his chest before reaching head height and giving him a lazy, tonguey kiss. James responded in kind, recognizing his own taste again, this time on Shepard’s tongue. It was just as inexplicably arousing as he’d anticipated it would be.

Steve moved back down to James’s waist and picked up where Shepard had left off. His lips slid easily down James’s shaft thanks to the liberal coating of saliva Shepard had left behind, though he took it carefully slow. Shepard’s lips moved from James’s to his jaw, and then to his neck. He paused there briefly, flicking biotic sparks with his tongue against the pulse at James’s throat. James took the opportunity to rub the top of Shepard’s head, enjoying the velvety sensation of buzzcut against his fingers.

Eventually, Shepard worked his way back down to join Steve, giving him another heated kiss around the head of James’s dick – at least partially, James suspected, to hear the noises he made. He could see the corners of Shepard’s mouth quirk when he groaned and swore. As soon as Steve trailed his lips up the line of Shepard’s jaw to his ear and out of the way, Shepard went down on James again, swirling his tongue around and around with its delightful biotic tickles.

“ _Damn_ it, you guys.” James arched his back against the bed, luxuriating in the sensations. “You make a great team.” Feeling bold, he rolled his hips up into Shepard’s mouth, pushing his cock deeper with a mumbled, incoherent noise of pleasure. It felt so incredible that he immediately did it again, and then again much deeper and with the added pressure of his hand on the back of Shepard’s head. Only then did the thought occur to him that Shepard might not like having his mouth invaded like that.

“Shit,” James said as he withdrew his hand. Shepard pulled up and gave him a look. “Uh... sorry, Commander, I-”

“Vega.” James stopped talking when Shepard cut him off. “Relax. I’m not your Commander right now... I’m just a guy who wants to see the look on your face when you come.”

James blinked and tried not to look too gobsmacked by words he’d never in his life imagined he might hear from a superior officer. “Oh... uh... sure. Cool.”

Steve was watching him with a knowing smile. James averted his eyes, suddenly embarrassed and not really sure why. He forgot all about it, however, when his friend’s warm mouth engulfed him once more, all the way to the base.

“Mmm... _damn_ , that’s good.”

“As good as you’d like it?” Shepard said, fingertips dancing with biotic sparks over James’s abs. The little tingling shocks made James twitch, and he had to work not to let himself get carried away and shove his dick into Steve’s mouth too hard.

“Huh?”

“You want to do it harder, don’t you? Just admit it, Vega, I can see it in your eyes.”

“I... okay, yeah, I do,” James said. “But I’m not so drunk I can’t keep myself from choking Esteban. I’ve never met a girl who likes it when I try to fuck her face. I mean without asking first. Why would a guy be any different?”

Steve himself offered no comment, though he was still watching James with that glint of mischief in his eyes even as he was sucking him off. It was almost as unsettling as it was hot.

“It’s not choking you have to worry about,” Shepard informed him. “I mean, yes it is, but it’s easy enough to take breaks for breath. The real problem is gagging.”

“Okay,” James said, annoyed. “Gagging, then. That’s _worse_. I’m pretty goddamn sure Esteban’s not interested in puking all over my dick. And I’m not either. Really, _really_ not. Ugh.” He shuddered. “Why are we even talking about this?”

“Because there’s a trick to it,” Shepard said. “I’ll show you what I mean.”

He nudged Steve, who then pulled back and shifted over onto his side. Steve leaned down to place a soft kiss on James’s thigh, glancing up at him and starting to laugh at the look on his face.

“What?” James asked.

“You just look so freaked out,” Steve said, reaching over to run a finger down Shepard’s spine. “Relax, James. Nobody’s going to puke. Unless-” he suddenly looked concerned. “You’re not drunk enough to throw up, are you?”

“ _No_ , goddamnit,” James said. “I’m never that drunk. I like partying with my friends, not making myself sick.”

“Glad to hear it,” Shepard said. “Now watch.”

He proceeded to go down on James’s dick to the base, as he had done several times before. He bobbed up and down a few times, but aside from the addition of a few more delicious tingles of biotic energy from his tongue, James noted nothing new about his technique. He tried not to be disappointed when Shepard stopped, looking at him expectantly.

“I don’t get it,” James said after a moment.

“I can take your whole dick without gagging,” Shepard said.

“Awesome?”

“So as long as you’re... well, _relatively_ gentle,” Shepard went on, “you can – what did you say? Fuck my face, all you want.”

James blinked and opened his mouth to reply, but said nothing. He looked at Steve, who looked right back at him, stifling giggles.

“Well?” Shepard said.

“You are the fucking weirdest CO I’ve ever had,” James said.

“But?”

“But if you’re so eager for me to get some mileage out of that talented biotic tongue of yours... well, then...”

Shepard licked a trail up the underside of his dick, staring into his eyes, daring him to take what he wanted. James’s heart was already pounding from trying to concentrate on the other two through the drunken, lusty fog in his brain, but the anticipation as he got a secure hold on either side of Shepard’s head just excited him further. He licked his lips.

“Bring it on,” James growled. Shepard opened his mouth, and James pushed himself in eagerly. He started to roll his hips, working up a rhythm. Lingering uncertainty made him gentle at first, but as Shepard took everything he gave smoothly and with no sign of discomfort, James started to be more forceful. It wasn’t as hard to loosen his inhibitions as he’d thought it would be; what the tequila hadn’t already dissolved, the hard surge of pleasure he felt every time the head of his dick hit the back of Shepard’s throat made short work of.

“Yeah,” James muttered through gritted teeth, watching the serious-Commander expression on Shepard’s face – whenever it wasn’t buried in his crotch, anyway – with a mixture of amusement and lust. “You look good with my dick in your mouth, Loco. Takin’ it all like a champ. You let Esteban do this to you too?” He glanced at Steve, who had moved up to nuzzle against his arm while shooting him sultry looks. “Yeah, I bet you do. Bet he loves it. Bet _you_ love it, too. Isn’t that right? You fuckin’ like it when I shove my dick down your throat, no? ‘Course you do... why else would you have showed off your skills, practically dared me to do it?”

He snickered, and Steve started giggling again.

“Commander Shepard, hero of the Skyllian Blitz, first human Spectre, badass biotic, gives _amazing_ blowjobs, loves it when his lieutenants fuck his face...”

James was amusing the hell out of himself, but it was getting harder to laugh without moaning at the same time. Shepard just kept at it, letting James use his mouth without complaint. He resisted the push of James’s hands only for a few seconds every now and then to take a breath, and afterwards they fell right back into the intimate rhythm. James was starting to breathe harder, and he wondered if he should stop now while he still had the willpower. Face-fucking him was one thing, but coming right down Shepard throat was a whole other ball of wax.

“Shit, that’s good,” he panted, speeding up just a little more. Shepard was holding his tongue stiff against James’s shaft as it glided in and out of his mouth. He started releasing a tiny biotic spark every time James reached his deepest point, encouraging him.

“Oh, _shit_!” James loved it, but he was too close to climax already. He mustered his willpower and slowed his hips to a stop, just seconds away from the point of no return. Clenching his teeth, James pulled his dick out of Shepard’s mouth, let go of his head and clenched his fists. The urge to jerk off was intense – he could feel a powerful orgasm coiling in the pit of his groin, just waiting to be released, but he took slow, deep breaths and backed away from the edge.

“What the hell, Vega?” Shepard seemed surprised. “Thought you wanted to see how far you could go.”

“I just about busted there, Loco,” James said.

“Isn’t that the idea?” Shepard said dryly, staring at him with eyebrows raised. Steve rolled onto his back next to James with one hand on his forehead, laughing softly.

“What?” James asked, not sure he got the joke. “I’d rather wait. After I come, it’ll be a little while before I can come again, you know? I don’t want to stop just yet. You haven’t even taken your damn underwear off!”

“All in good time,” Shepard said smoothly. “Besides, you don’t have to worry about refractory periods. I’m sure you’re just as virile as you look. I bet I could nut you five times in one night.”

Now it was James’s turn to laugh. “O _ho_! You think so, do you?”

“You want me to prove it?” Shepard challenged.

James stared at him thoughtfully, reaching down to stroke his cock with careful slowness. If Shepard couldn’t make good on his promise, and he shot his load now, he’d be bored and awkward and in the way of the other two having their fun for the rest of the night – or until they kicked him out. But if Shepard _could_ do as he said...

“Five times in one night?” James said, still not quite believing it. He looked at Steve.

“He’s serious,” Steve said. “I think he’s only gotten five out of me once or twice, but it wasn’t for lack of trying on his part that I didn’t make it to six. He’s good.”

“Well,” James said. “As much as I like the idea of shooting into your mouth...” He paused, waiting for Shepard to tell him he was out of his fragged mind if he thought _that_ was going to happen, but Shepard just stared, waiting for him to continue.

James shook his head in disbelief. “I think I’ll wait.”

“Why’s that?” Shepard asked.

“I get that you’re good at this,” James said. “Even if you can say you can read my personality or some shit and just _know_ what turns my crank, I know talent when I see it.”

“So,” Shepard prompted.

“I’m just not sure _I_ can handle it,” James admitted. “Five times in one night? I mean, I’d love to give it a try another time... if you guys want me back after tonight. Knowing what I know now about the two of you and your bedroom habits, I’ll be proud of myself if I can last another five minutes.”

“Alright then,” Shepard said. “I’ll buy that... for now.”

Steve shifted closer and walked his fingers up James’s arm, leaning in to nose against his shoulder. “If you’ve had your fill for now,” he said, “think you could return the favour?”

James turned his head to give Steve a smirk. He’d already considered the idea, and now he considered it some more. It still made him a little uncomfortable. It certainly wasn’t something he’d thought much about before a few days ago – at all, really. But he wanted this to be good for Shepard and Steve too, and he was willing to try. He didn’t have Shepard’s loco biotic tongue, but the bit of reading he had done on the extranet in anticipation of this very situation had taught him the basics. James knew what _he_ liked, after all, and how different could it be for another guy?

Besides, Shepard and Steve had both given him head already. At the same time, even. And Shepard hadn’t gotten any attention at all, yet. It was only fair he give some back.

“Yeah,” James said. “I’ll give it a shot. You want some, Shepard?”

“Not yet,” Shepard said. James blinked.

“Really? You’ve been suckin’ away down there with nothing to show for it... you sure you don’t want some tongue?”

“Oh, I’ll have your tongue, Vega,” Shepard said with such certainty that James blinked and Steve giggled. “Don’t think I won’t. But it’ll be where I want it, when I want it.”

“Whatever you say, Loco,” James said with a snicker. “Guess you’re the lucky guy, Esteban. Prepare to have your mind blown by my mediocre skills at sucking dick!”

Steve wasted no time rolling onto his back and turning around, so his feet were at the head of the bed. “Come over here,” he said. “On top of me.”

James sat up and pushed himself forward onto his knees, making a few more halting motions while he figured out what Steve was talking about. “How are you – oh, I get it,” James said. “You want to sixty-nine?”

Steve winked at him. “Might be fun,” he said. “Turn around.”

Shepard moved out of the way, watching them with a gleam in his eyes while James did as requested and maneuvered himself into position above Steve’s head.

“Go slow, Esteban,” he said as he leaned down, bracing himself to either side of Steve’s hips and trying hard to keep looking at the sizable erection laying against his buddy’s stomach. He felt Steve take his dick in hand and gave him an encouraging squeeze.

James licked his lips and, swallowing his awkwardness, ran his tongue down the length of Steve’s dick.

The taste made him pause at the base, a thoughtful look on his face. He ran his tongue back up and over the head. It tasted like ...skin.

Well, what had he been expecting? Tequila? Fish? Candy? The thought made him snort, which immediately became a snorting chuckle.

“What’s so funny, Vega?” Shepard was clearly amused as hell at James’s evident lack of any idea what he was doing.

James forced the image of tequila-flavoured candy dicks to the back of his mind and tried to recover some dignity. He licked down Steve’s dick again, this time shooting a smirk at Shepard and waggling his eyebrows while he did it. Shepard’s self-satisfied expression slackened somewhat, and his hand moved to rub himself through his boxer-briefs. _Success_.

Supporting himself on one hand, James took Steve’s dick in his other and lifted it to get a better angle for his tongue. He gave Steve a few slow, smooth strokes near the base while he swirled his tongue around the head. He got a taste of the same saltiness he’d felt on Steve’s tongue, and later Shepard’s, which he recognized as precome. When he took a deep breath in preparation for the next step, James got a powerful whiff of something else. He wasn’t sure what it was, but it seemed to hit him just right. He sniffed again, intrigued, and the smell seemed to urge him on. He leaned down to get as much of Steve’s dick into his mouth as he could comfortably fit, massaging it with his tongue and the roof of his mouth.

Steve responded with a soft groan, so apparently he was doing something right. James was proud of himself, but he had to keep it up if he wanted to do a really good job. He continued what he was doing, surprised to find himself kind of getting into it. Steve’s slow but ceaseless stroke on his own dick, plus the occasional soft kiss, certainly helped, but mostly it was that damned _smell_. James would have been aroused and hardening the moment he caught it if his dick hadn’t been fully erect already. What was it? Sweat, maybe? He knew what sweat smelled like, or he knew what his _own_ sweat smelled like, and it had never turned him on in the slightest. The scent that seemed to linger around Steve’s groin area was similar to sweat, but it lacked the rankness and added something else.

Steve’s dick was of sufficient size that James could get barely half of it into his mouth before it became uncomfortable. He could _feel_ his gag reflex lurking in the back of his throat, ready to vehemently reject any attempt at emulating Shepard’s amazing blowjob abilities. Hoping that Steve would cut him some slack, being as this was his first time ever sucking a dick, James didn’t push himself any farther than he knew he could go. He tried to make up for it by keeping his tongue moving, and by using his hand to stroke and squeeze Steve’s dick around the base where he couldn’t get his mouth.

Steve was breathing noticeably faster underneath him, letting out little sighs and groans that let James know he was doing an adequate job. The taut muscles of Steve’s abs rolled up and down with his breath, and James found the sight oddly mesmerizing. He drew his mouth off for a moment, keeping his hand moving, and leaned down to run his lips along the furrow of Steve’s abs. The trail of soft hair tickled his nose.

“Damn, Esteban,” James grunted. “You smell _good_.”

“I’m so pleased that you think so,” Steve said dryly. “It would hardly do if you were repulsed by the smell of my dick, would it?”

“Repulsed?” James said. “No way, man. It’s... weirdly hot.”

Steve responded by engulfing James’s balls in his mouth, both at once, and sucking gently while he squeezed his dick. James exhaled hard at the sensation and wasted no time getting his mouth back on Steve to return the favour.

Shepard had disappeared from James’s peripheral vision at some point, shifting the mattress as he moved around on the bed. He hadn’t gone far, however, nor had he lost interest, as James realized when he felt fingers dancing up his spine. They weren’t Steve’s, because Steve had one hand on his dick and another on his hip. Shepard followed his fingers with his tongue, every so often trailing a lick of biotic energy that set James’s nerves tingling excitedly.

While James was doing his best at giving Steve head, Shepard explored his upper body with his hands and tongue. His roving fingers were gentle, almost reverent. He pointedly avoided going near James’s ticklish armpits, which James deeply appreciated. The last thing he needed was to accidentally bite Steve somewhere no man should ever be bitten. A pleasant little shiver ran though him at the feeling of Shepard’s stubble rubbing against his butt, and then down his thigh.

“Vega,” Shepard murmured. “You are fucking _gorgeous_.” He planted a soft kiss in the small of his back.

James popped Steve’s dick out of his mouth and said “Glad you’re pleased, Loco,” riding a surge of cocky satisfaction. A moment later, it turned to paralyzing shock as he felt what was unmistakably a warm, wet tongue sliding down the crack of his butt and over his asshole.

“WHOOOAAA!” James yelled, eyes bulging out. “Loco! What the unholy crap are you _doing_?!”

The tongue withdrew. “What do you _think_ I’m doing?” Shepard said. He sounded annoyed, but when James looked over his shoulder at him, Shepard was grinning like the Cheshire cat. Steve laughed helplessly, his face buried in James’s groin.

“Would you like me to draw you a diagram?” Shepard added as James just kept staring at him in slack-jawed disbelief.

“I... I...” James’s voice took on a distinctly higher pitch than usual. “I have no idea what to say.”

Steve laughed harder.

“Why do you need to say anything?” Shepard said, no longer even trying to hide his amusement.

“I just... I mean... is that _sanitary_?” James looked down at the bed between Steve’s thighs, mostly because his neck was hurting from craning it over his shoulder. “How are you even... and _why_? Why would you do that?!”

“You liked it, didn’t you?” Steve asked.

James blinked. “Uh... I dunno. That really threw me for a loop, amigo. I didn’t really notice if I liked it or not.”

“Then keep still for a moment.” Shepard didn’t give him a chance to argue before he leaned in and licked there again, hard, this time adding some probing and swirling. James couldn’t help himself; he closed his eyes and moaned, because as bizarre as it was, there was no doubt it felt really, really good.

“So?” Shepard said after he’d stopped.

“Yeah,” James said reluctantly. “Sure, I loved it. But...”

“So, that’s why,” Shepard said, infuriatingly smug, and he went right back to it. James could feel Shepard’s hands on his butt, spreading him to get better access for his tongue. Steve, having recovered somewhat from his laughing fit, chose that moment to take James’s entire length into his mouth. The crazy dual stimulation shot his body through with weakness as well as pleasure, and his arms trembled.

Trying to rein in the somewhat embarrassing noises he was making with moderate success, James threw himself into blowing Steve, determined to give back as good as he was getting. It was incredibly difficult to concentrate on it with both Shepard and Steve using their mouths and tongues on the most sensitive parts of his body, but James did his best. And Steve was breathing faster and making little moans of his own, so he was doing something right. Even so, he couldn’t keep it up.

“Alright!” he said after only a few minutes. “Alright, goddamnit! Stop!”

Shepard drew back, and Steve ceased his expert, carefully slow blowjob. “What’s the matter?” Shepard asked as James rolled off of Steve onto his back, panting heavily.

“Same damn thing,” James replied once he’d caught some of his breath. “I’m gonna blow if you guys don’t calm your shit. Fucking hell, that _tongue_!”

Steve rolled over onto his stomach and pushed himself upright, settling onto his knees next to Shepard, who wrapped an arm around his shoulders and leaned in for a nuzzle. The two of them spent the next several moments kissing, giggling, and shooting James highly entertained smirks. Eventually he got tired of it, and started replying with stern looks.

“You good, Mr. Vega?” Steve asked.

“Alright, come on,” James said, maneuvering himself into an upright position so he could face them at eye level. “You’ve proved to me that you’re both completely batshit crazy, now let’s have some actual dicks going into butts while I still have willpower.”

“You still have willpower?” Shepard said, as if insulted. “I’m slipping.”

“Looks like you’ve finally met your match, Shepard,” Steve teased. Shepard gave him a snarky glance loaded with hidden meaning, which only seemed to invite Steve to give him another tonguey kiss. James averted his eyes, another twinge of awkwardness making him shy. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he was invading a private moment. He knew he wasn’t really, because neither of them would have let it happen if it was something they actually wanted kept private from him. But the implications still felt weird. Like Shepard hadn’t _already_ met his match, and that match was Steve.

“Next time, he’s not going to let you stop him from using his mouth to make you come,” Steve informed him after a moment. “He’ll have you whimpering in five minutes.”

James looked up at them and blinked. So they _were_ going to want him back after this. “I... oh,” he said weakly. “Next time, eh?”

“What, aren’t you having fun?” Shepard said.

“Are you kidding?!” James laughed in sheer incredulity. “You guys are the best sex I’ve had in years.”

“So that’s a yes.”

“Of course!”

“Then the probability is high that there’ll be a next time,” Shepard said calmly, as if this logic should have been obvious. “It might be a while before we have nothing else more important we need to be doing, but might I remind you that on occasion our profession necessitates ten-plus hours of interstellar transit, soldier?”

“Uh huh.” James shook his head. He felt like he was dreaming. This whole thing seemed too crazy and improbable, not to mention too _good_ , to be a part of the same galaxy he’d inhabited to this point. James Vega was one lucky son of a bitch, that was for damn sure, and he vowed there and then never to lose sight of that. He would use every advantage he had to keep the galaxy safe, and if that included improving his mood during on-duty hours via mind blowing sex with his best friend and his commanding officer while off, then that was that.

“Five minutes,” he said, folding his arms and putting on his best smirk. “Next time. I’m gonna hold you to that, Loco.”

“Oh?” Shepard mirrored his pose and stared him down. “What will you do if I can’t, Vega?”

Now that he’d seen his playful, mischievous approach to sex, there was little doubt in James’s mind that Shepard could keep his promise, and probably in _less_ than five minutes. But he wasn’t going to tell Shepard that.

“So it’s a bet you want, eh? Well, fine. If you can’t do it, then I get to...” James considered the matter for a few moments. “Then Esteban and I get to tie you up and tickle you,” he decided. “For however long it took you to make me come.”

“Interesting,” Shepard said, stoically maintain his posture even while Steve slumped against him, giggling. “And if I can?”

“If you can... then... you’ll have made me come in five minutes or less,” James said. “You get bragging rights. To me and Esteban, anyway.”

“No deal,” Shepard said seriously. “If you’re going to have a shot at tying me up and tickling me for a minimum of three hundred and one seconds, then I need some incentive for taking the bet.”

“Hmmm.” James chewed his lip thoughtfully.

“If Shepard wins,” Steve began, “then you...”

He dissolved into giggles for several moments, during which Shepard and James watched him fondly.

“Then you clean his gun every night,” Steve said once he’d regained some of his composure. “For a week.”

James snorted. “I _already_ clean his guns, every day! I clean every gun on the ship small enough that a krogan could carry it.”

“Right,” Steve said. “That was the joke. I had – a different sort of gun in mind.” He broke down into drunken mirth again.

“I – _oh_.” James hesitated. Shepard was snickering, face buried in one hand, so James couldn’t read his expression. “Would that... would we even have time for that?”

“I’m not on duty round the clock,” Shepard informed him slyly. “I do get _some_ time off to sleep, you know. And... relax in other ways.”

“If you like,” Steve added, “you could consider it a verbal contract for seven blowjobs, to be redeemed at your mutual convenience.”

Shepard’s smile was positively evil. James was still not totally keen on the idea, but he couldn’t resist the challenge. Surely he could work on his stamina between now and their next sexual contact enough to last more than five minutes.

“You got yourself a deal, Loco,” he said smoothly, and Shepard made a silent fist-pumping _yes_ motion. He then spat on his hand and held it out to shake. James rolled his eyes but spat on his own hand and shook, sealing the deal. Shepard started laughing in a sinister manner, almost a cackle, and James was immediately nervous. He tried to reassure himself that he was bound to win. There was no way Shepard could be _that_ good. Five minutes, with no foreplay beforehand? Piece of cake.

Or... had _no foreplay_ even been part of the deal? It hadn’t come up. Should he have specified that? Shit, what had he gotten himself into?

“You know, I’m almost not sure whom I would rather win,” Steve commented.

Putting the bet out of his mind – it wasn’t going to be decided tonight, after all – James shuffled forward on his knees to get within tickling range of Shepard. “How ‘bout I give you a little taste of my side right now,” he said.

Before Shepard could do more than pre-emptively raise his hands, James pounced on him and kissed him hard, knocking him onto his back. He drove his fingers into Shepard’s armpits, attempting to engage in offensive tickling while he had Shepard distracted with the kiss, but his plan was doomed to failure. Shepard squirmed under his assault, but he retaliated by tickling James right back, adding in sporadic bursts of his biotic power.

James hung on stubbornly as long as he could, managing to stay on top of Shepard and maintain a semblance of having the upper hand for several moments. Shepard’s tongue was busy in his mouth, exploring everywhere he could reach, and the thought suddenly occurred to James where that tongue had been a minute or two ago. He paused, and it was all the opportunity Shepard needed to stun him with a powerful biotic tingle on both sides of his chest at once and flip him over. James found himself lying on his back, their positions reversed: Shepard was now on top of _him_ , relentlessly tickling his armpits, and James could do nothing but beg for mercy.

Eventually Shepard gave in and stopped tickling him, but immediately silenced James’s proclamations of gratitude with a fiery kiss. His tongue was right back where it had been, and James could feel Shepard’s lips curved in a smirk against his. Since there were no detectable uncomfortable taste sensations going on in between them, James decided he didn’t care about the recent ass-to-mouth contact and returned the kiss with interest. He wrapped his hands around Shepard’s back and caressed him a little as he moved his hands downward. His dick was pressed deliciously against Shepard’s stomach, and he ground up against him, enjoying the rub. He could feel Shepard’s erection through his underwear, equally hard.

James’s fingers met the smooth, dark fabric and slid lower until he could cup and squeeze Shepard’s ass.

“I can’t believe you haven’t taken your fuckin’ underwear off yet,” James managed to say around Shepard’s lips. “How long has it been?”

Shepard trailed his lips along James’s jaw to his ear, which he then nipped. “Do it for me then,” he breathed.

That was all the invitation James needed. He shoved Shepard off of him so the other man was lying on his back, then stood up on his knees and straddled Shepard’s legs. Shepard lifted his butt off the bed, allowing James to tug his boxer-briefs down and finally off. Shepard’s cock was dark with blood, fully erect, the tip already shiny and slick with precome. Feeling adventurous, James leaned down and ran his tongue up Shepard’s dick from the base to the head. He was rewarded with a throaty groan and a chuckle, and he shot Shepard a smug grin and a wink.

Steve, having meanwhile worked himself the rest of the way out of his underwear, now wrapped his arms around James’s stomach from behind and planted a soft kiss on his shoulder. “Who’s going first?” he asked sensually, and the question made James stop cold. He hadn’t even thought about who would go in what position. Was there a way all three of them could do it at once? Immediately his mind conceived of such a way, and he couldn’t help blushing just a little.

“Oooh,” Shepard said. “You’ve given him so many _thoughts_ , Steve. Awww... how adorable is that? He’s blushing!”

“Aw, shut up,” James said. “We’re, uh, we’re gonna need lube.”

“Got it covered,” Shepard said. “Let me up and I’ll get it.”

James and Steve moved back to allow Shepard to crawl over to where he could reach the small table beside the bed. James’s eyes immediately locked on Shepard’s muscular ass. He was staring at it. His Commander’s bare, hairy ass. James decided that it was a decent ass. It wasn’t _that_ hairy, but it was still unquestionably male. He’d long since stopped being surprised at what was turning him on, given how high-quality tequila had always affected him and the inherently sexy nature of what was going on. Still, he hadn’t quite expected to be almost literally salivating over Shepard’s ass and what he might get a chance to do to it. It looked... tight.

Now that James was thinking along the lines of preparing for actual penetrative sex, however, another concern popped into his mind.

“Hey, what about... uh...”

The other two waited, Shepard twisting halfway around to look at him. James scratched his head.

“What about _what_ , Vega?” Shepard asked.

James cleared his throat. “Protection?”

“Ah.” Shepard reached into the drawer he’d opened in the bedside table and produced a bottle containing a clear liquid, glimmering with an oily hint of blue. “Not to worry – this is a prophylactic lubricant. Asari-made. Antiviral, antibacterial barriers, that kind of thing. Even works cross-species. Just make sure you completely coat your dick at least once, and you should be fine. It probably won’t hurt to reapply it once or twice. Plus Steve and I were both tested a few months ago, and we came up clean. Neither of us has been with anyone else since then.”

“Huh,” James said, carefully pretending he hadn’t heard Shepard say the words _cross-species_. As much as he liked finding out all this stuff about Shepard’s intimate life, that was one place his mind was not yet prepared to go. “Alright then.”

So he wasn’t at risk. He hadn’t really thought he would be, but it was good to be sure. He didn’t think Shepard and Steve were at risk of catching anything from him, either, but he couldn’t be one hundred percent certain, and he thought he should tell them that.

“I haven’t had sex with anyone since Earth, and I used protection then, but I haven’t been, uh... tested, recently. Is that alright?”

“Yes you have,” Steve said.

“What?” James looked at him, surprised. “When?”

Steve reclined on one hand beside him and gave him a look. “Don’t you remember the medical exam Dr. Chakwas gave you after Menae?”

James blinked. “That was a routine checkup. Everyone had one of those.”

“It may have been routine, but it was _very_ thorough,” Shepard said.

James opened and closed his mouth several times without saying anything. Shepard rolled his eyes.

“Dr. Chakwas would have prescribed you something if you needed it. And as your commanding officer, I have access to all your records – medical included. I checked last night. You’re clean.”

James snorted. “Well, if you say so. That’s good. Glad I know.” He frowned slightly. “But... really, though? How can you be sure? Can the doc really figure out that kind of stuff just from a scan? All she did was use her omni-tool...”

“Medical omni-tool software can detect blood properties through skin,” Shepard said impatiently. “Traces of bacteria, too. And what it can’t pick up, your implants can. We have the technology, Vega. Do you want to keep talking about it, or are you going to shut up and fuck?”

James snorted. “Okay, okay, I see your point. I choose fuck.”

Steve moved around on the bed to face James and leaned in to nose against his shoulder. James wrapped Steve in his arms affectionately and planted a kiss on his head.

“I get him first,” Steve said, shooting a look at Shepard out of the corner of his eye.

Shepard looked so put out by the suggestion that James couldn’t help snickering. “Why do _you_ get him first?” he complained.

“Because I called it, of course,” Steve said matter-of-factly. “And because this entire thing was _my_ idea.”

Shepard made a sarcastic face at him, but the corners of his mouth were quirking upwards. He made a show of reluctantly dropping the bottle of lube into Steve’s outstretched hand.

“You gonna fuck me, Esteban?” James said playfully as Steve clicked open the bottle. He wasn’t sure if the idea made him nervous or excited.

“I was thinking it could be the other way around,” Steve said softly, raising his eyes to James’s with seductive slowness. “...At first, anyway.”

James felt a lube-slick hand close around his dick, and at once his heart began to beat faster. “Can do, Esteban,” he said, sliding his hands down Steve’s arms. He leaned in to place a quick kiss on Steve’s jaw before taking the bottle and nudging his shoulder, trying to turn him around.

“No,” Steve said, resisting the motion. “I want to face you.”

“Oh – sure thing,” James said. “You want to lie on your back?”

“How about you lie on _your_ back?”

“But you said... _ahhh_ , okay.” James cracked a smirk as Steve nodded, eyes gleaming. “I get it. You want to be a cowboy.”

“Why not?” Now it was Steve trying to turn him around, so he could lie with his head on the pillow. James let him do it. Steve squeezed his shoulders, leaned in close and brushed his lips against James’s ear. “I’ve got a big bull of a man right here practically _begging_ me to ride him...”

The shock of lust that pulsed through him at the words rendered James briefly unable to speak. He wanted Steve on his dick, _now_. He satisfied himself briefly by growling and sucking on Steve’s neck until the other man pushed him onto his back. He maneuvered his legs out from under him to lie flat, at which point he realized he was still holding the bottle of lube. He tried to open it, only to realize to his embarrassment that he couldn’t figure out how.

“Agh, tech’s not my speciality,” James muttered.

“It’s a bottle of lube, Vega,” Shepard said. “Not an anti-air tower.”

“Why don’t you try kicking it?” Steve suggested, maintaining an admirably neutral expression and tone of voice. James gave him a withering look, and Steve’s mask cracked into a cascade of giggles.

“Here, I’ll do it,” Shepard said. James handed him the bottle, trying not to look like too much of an idiot. Steve had straddled his legs and was waiting patiently, idly tracing his fingers up and down James’s thighs.

“Solid,” Steve murmured appreciatively. James stared into his eyes, panting with lust. That damn smirk on Steve’s face was just so _sexy_. What the hell was taking Shepard so long?

Searching for a way to check the urge to jerk off, James laced his fingers together between the pillow and his head. His eyes drifted closed. He was so close to orgasm already that he couldn’t imagine how he was going to control himself once his dick was pushing into that tight, warm channel...

He groaned, imagining he could feel it already. The sensation was unexpectedly vivid. James opened his eyes to see that Shepard was lubing him up with a tight, carefully slow grip. When James looked at him, Shepard was staring right back, wearing an smirk identical to Steve’s. James couldn’t help laughing at the two of them. He was putty in their hands – literally and figuratively – and all three of them knew it.

“That stuff works, right?” James asked, eyeing the bottle in Shepard’s hand dubiously. “It’s not gonna rub off from the... uh... friction, is it?”

“No,” Shepard said. “Asari have been having sex with people from different biomes for twenty five hundred years. Trust the science.”

“Okay then.” He hadn’t really been concerned, anyway. Still, prophylactic lubricant was a novel concept to him. He filed it away for later reference.

Shepard’s palm slid over the head of his dick, exquisitely smooth and warm, and James’s whole body tensed instinctively. “ _Dios_! What the fuck was that, Loco? Biotic?”

“No, that was lubricant and sensitive nerve endings.” The head of his dick was shiny with lubricant, but Shepard palmed him again anyways. James twitched, loosing a string of eloquent Spanish cursing while both Steve and Shepard snickered.

“Hurry it up, would you?” James groaned. “Do you _want_ me to blow without ever having fucked either one of you?”

“That would actually amuse the hell out of me,” Shepard said. “Still, I have a feeling Steve would punish me for it later, so here you go.” He added another drop of lube to his fingers and worked it around James’s foreskin, being gentle enough to avoid more over-stimulation. “You’re all set. Fuck away, boys.”

“Finally,” Steve said, crawling forward into position. He reached behind him to grab James’s dick and guide it toward his ass. James settled his hands, shaking ever so slightly, onto Steve’s hips.

“ _Si_ , Esteban,” James breathed as the head of his dick slipped into Steve. “Come on... take it in, take it all in. _Buen chico_... yeah.”

Steve was biting his lip against the wincing as he slid downward, filling himself with James and engulfing him in warmth. He met James’s gaze steadily, bracing against his chest, never stopping until he was as full as he could be and both of them were as tense as coiled springs. Steve grunted and shifted his butt against James’s hips, slowly relaxing the tightness out of his muscles while he adjusted to the intrusion.

“Good?” James said huskily, rubbing Steve’s waist with his thumbs, eager to get going.

“Gimme a minute,” Steve said through his teeth. James growled but forced himself to keep still, waiting patiently. He grabbed one of Steve’s hands and brought it to his mouth, trailing light kisses along his friend’s fingers.

“Hang in there, Vega,” Shepard commented, flopping onto his side beside them and starting to stroke his cock slowly. “He likes to take his time, but once he’s adjusted... he’s good. Oh, is he ever _good_.”

“Lookin’ forward to it,” James said, giving Steve what he hoped was a sexy, smoldering glance. Steve stared back, mouth hanging open a little, taking deep breaths. He rolled his hips forward experimentally, giving James a squeeze with his butt at the same time. As he started to reverse his motion, James moved with him instinctively, pushing his hips forward to bury himself deeper. Steve let out a long sigh and leaned forward, moving his hands to James’s shoulders.

“Fuck me, Mr. Vega,” he whispered.

“Happy to.”

They started to move together, lost in each other’s eyes. Given the usual sloppiness of how he fucked when he was this drunk, James was surprised at the grace with which they managed to grind against one another. It was a slow, intimate rhythm, delightfully smooth and afire with heat. James pushed and Steve pushed back. He flexed and Steve clenched around him. He wanted so badly to go faster and harder, as hard as he could, but he knew he wouldn’t last more than another minute if he did. It was almost maddening to continually check himself, but the look of quiet bliss on Steve’s face made it worth keeping cool.

“ _Bueno_ , Esteban,” James said huskily. “ _Muy bueno_.”

“Like it, Jimmy?” Steve replied, breathing hard, and he ran his tongue slowly along his upper lip. It was the first time James could ever recall Steve calling him _Jimmy_ , and his heart melted with affection. His buddy, his best buddy. Such a great guy. And such a _tight ass_. His buddy was riding his cock like a fucking pro, and it was fantastic.

“Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, I like it. _Dios_ , I like it.”

“Good.” Steve was hunched over him, gripping his shoulders. James lifted one hand to trace the gleam of sweat on Steve’s brow, too caught up in the friction and the warmth of their connection to care that his mouth was hanging open stupidly. Steve smirked at him and took James’s hand, guiding it to his mouth to suck gently on his first two fingers. James smiled back and stroked Steve’s chin with his thumb.

Shepard’s calloused fingers slid lightly over his ribs, just barely shy of ticklish. James twitched a little and giggled at the contact, and he felt soft breath on his shoulder as Shepard snickered.

“ _Jimmy_ ,” Shepard murmured before planting a kiss on James’s collarbone. “I like that. Jimmy Vega. You two are magnificent together.”

He nuzzled against James’s shoulder and continued to caress his chest and abs with a gentle touch. Seeing an opportunity, James withdrew his fingers from Steve’s mouth and used them instead to guide Shepard’s wandering hand to Steve’s dick, bobbing softly with the roll of his hips. Shepard immediately took up a firm, steady stroke, and Steve made a guttural noise.

“Yeah...”

Steve flexed his shoulders and lifted his hands to lace his fingers together behind his head. His eyes drifted closed as his hips slid back and forth between Shepard’s hand and James’s thighs, responding to both men. James watched him intently, his focus totally eclipsed by the pleasure etched in Steve’s expression. He licked his lips, wanting a kiss but not enough to break Steve out of his happy state.

James felt Shepard shifting on the bed beside him. A moment later a stubbly chin rubbed against his. As if sensing his desire, Shepard kissed him with a gentleness that was almost unbearably erotic, keeping his arm extended back to Steve. James responded eagerly and sensed the low vibration of a pleased growl in Shepard’s throat. He laid his hand against the back of Shepard’s head, enjoying the velvety texture of his shaved hair as much as the playful interaction of their tongues. Shepard smiled against his mouth.

Far more so now than when Shepard had been levitating him biotically, James felt like he was floating. Steve’s back-and-forth motion on his dick was ceaselessly smooth and slow, keeping James perpetually hovering on the brink of orgasm without quite pushing him over the edge. Every nerve in James’s body urged him to get a solid grip on Steve’s hips and fuck ravenously until the heat and pleasure exploded out of him. Yet Shepard’s lips and gentle touches here and there on his body kept him strangely calm and focused. The Commander’s legendary ironclad self-control was rubbing off on him through the dance of their tongues.

Even so, the longer it went on the less James felt able to continue without letting himself go completely. He wanted to fuck faster and harder so badly that it was becoming a physical ache. His deep groans were starting to sounding more like whimpers. Steve, it seemed, sensed his friend’s dwindling willpower, or maybe he just noticed the slight shake in James’s fingers on the skin of his hip. Shepard withdrew as Steve opened his eyes, seeing the silent pleading in James’s expression. Steve leaned down, pausing when their faces were centimeters apart.

“I’m so glad you’re enjoying yourself, Mr. Vega,” he said softly.

James barked out a hoarse laugh. “I was just gonna say the same thing to you, Esteban.”

Steve didn’t answer, just gave him a sly, sexy smile that did nothing for James’s self-control.

“You’re killin’ me here, man,” James said, trying and failing to keep the whine out of his voice. His brow creased, eyebrows arched in supplication, James lifted his hand to stroke Steve’s jaw. “Come _onnn_.”

“Nothing stopping you from taking what you want,” Shepard noted.

“Yeah, but-” James’s feeble retort was cut off as Steve started nibbling on his lower lip. He groaned, bucking his hips upward once or twice to get what friction he could, but suddenly Shepard was straddling his knees and holding his legs down. He could barely move.

“Except me,” Shepard said smugly. “Too bad, Vega. You missed your chance.”

James threw his head back. “Fuck _yooouuu!_ ” he moaned, hardly having to exaggerate his despair.

Steve snickered. “Awww... Come on, Shepard, he’s been riding the edge for quite a while now. Let’s give him his head.”

“But I haven’t even stuck my dick up his butt yet,” Shepard complained. James couldn’t see him behind Steve, but Shepard’s tone of voice was laced with such convincing petulance that he couldn’t help laughing.

“Who says I’ll let you stick your dick up my butt, Loco?” he snarked.

Shepard shifted forward, supporting himself on his knees to either side of James’s thighs and wrapping his arms around Steve’s stomach. He rested his chin on Steve’s shoulder, giving James a so-so attempt at puppy-dog eyes.

“Soldier, are you telling me you’re not even going to let me at that magnificent muscular bubble butt of yours?”

“Oh, look! He’s pouting,” Steve laughed, turning his head to look at Shepard. “Are you really going to let him pout like that, Jimmy?”

Shepard, for his part, couldn’t keep up the pretense for more than a few seconds before giving Steve a goofy, yet adorable smile. Still wrestling with his self-control, James took a breath and tried to think clearly.

“I dunno, man. I’ve only ever been fucked like that once, and it was _you_ , years ago. It’s... not really my thing.”

Shepard looked at him. “You’ve been watching Steve’s face for the last fifteen minutes and you still think it’s no fun?” he said, quite reasonably.

James blinked as he thought that through.

“You know, if you let him fuck you just for a little while, he’ll be happy,” Steve said. “Then he’ll be able to say he’s fucked the great James Vega, and you’ll be able to say you fucked the first-human-Spectre-hero-of-the-Citadel-saviour-of-the-galaxy etcetera. Just... you know... leave out the part where you were the bottom.”

James put on a mock thoughtful face. “When you put it like that...”

“ _And_ ,” Shepard piped up enticingly, “I’ll let you come.”

“Awww, shit,” James muttered. “Alright, fine.”

Shepard positively cackled at that, and James felt a spike of nervous anticipation in his gut. He tightened his grip on Steve’s shuddering hips briefly, enough to still his friend’s movements while Shepard rolled to the side and cast about for the bottle of lube.

Slowly, carefully, Steve raised himself off James’s stiff cock and moved to the side. James let out a breath as his dick slapped down onto his skin, glistening wet with lube and precome. His hand jerked instinctively, but he managed to stop himself before he could touch his dick. He had a feeling that if he so much as squeezed his shaft, he would shoot hard enough to hit himself in the face.

“Don’t let me,” he said. Steve took his hands and pulled James up into a sitting position, planting soft kisses on his left wrist and then his right.

“Tell you what,” Steve said, looking him in the eye. “You let Shepard fuck you for a few minutes, and then you can have me again... at the same time.”

James liked that idea immensely. “Oh, _hell_ yes,” he breathed, eliciting a snicker from Shepard.

“Alright Vega, turn the fuck over already.” Shepard was upright on his knees, already sliding his lube-covered hand up and down his erection. James eyed it a little apprehensively, memories of his time with Steve many years ago promising some intense discomfort in his near future. At first, anyway. He was drunk, as he had been then, so the memories were fuzzy, but he did remember the sensations getting better as they had gone on. He couldn’t quite remember what those sensations had felt like, though. Shepard’s dick was probably about as big as his was – above average, if he was being generous – but at least he wasn’t as big as Steve, who was unquestionably _big._

Obediently, James turned over so his butt was facing Shepard. Steve sat back in front of him, casually stroking himself and watching the proceedings with a glint of erotic amusement. James bent down onto all fours and, seeing Steve’s gaze on him, bared his teeth and growled.

“Oh, Mr. Vega,” Steve said smoothly. “You’re going to love this.”

“I sure hope so,” James shot back.

He could feel Shepard moving up behind him, running a warm hand down his side. “Beautiful. I’ve been waiting a long time for this. You ready to be fucked by your commanding officer, Vega?”

“I thought you weren’t my commanding officer in here,” James said, just to be difficult. A moment later he yelped as Shepard delivered a sharp slap to his left ass cheek.

“I _said_ -” There came another slap, this time to his right cheek. “Are you ready to be _fucked,_ Vega?”

Shepard was using his Commander voice, but that only spurred James to mouth off even harder. If he was honest with himself, he welcomed the distraction from his rock-hard dick, drooling precome and aching to be touched.

“I sure as hell hope you’re gonna lube me up first, _pendejo_ ,” James exclaimed. In response a slick finger slid down the cleft of his butt and over his hole, making him sigh. The gentle stimulation felt very new and unusual, not something he’d ever consciously expected to feel. Indeed, the soft, silky pad of Shepard’s finger felt pretty good, though not quite as good as his tongue had felt half an hour earlier. Then that finger was _inside_ him, slipping past his sphincter and going deeper. That was unexpected, and incredibly strange, but not wholly painful. James focused on keeping his breathing calm, though his heart was racing.

Steve watched his face as Shepard carefully probed his finger in and out, letting James get used to the sensation. There was a moment when the discomfort did become actual pain, prompting a wince. Shepard noticed, and withdrew his finger; when he reinserted it a moment later, James could tell he had added more lube, for which he was grateful. The smooth in-and-out motion was hardly the burning agony he’d feared, and after a while he started to enjoy it.

“This isn’t so bad,” he commented, the closest he could bring himself to outright asking for more.

“No?” Shepard sounded amused. “Good. How about... this?”

He curled his finger and stroked something inside James that made him jerk and gasp. It felt like whatever Shepard had touched was twice as sensitive as the surrounding flesh, or more. It was an intensely intimate sensation, and it sent a ripple of warm pleasure up through the core of his body.

“ _Yeah_ ,” James grunted. “That was good too. Do it again.”

Shepard complied, and James squirmed against him, surprised to find himself eager for something deeper and thicker than just a finger. He thought about what Shepard had said, about him having had a view of the pleasure etched on Steve’s face while he’d been fucking him, and realized there was definitely something to this getting-fucked thing.

“Okay, Loco,” James said. “Let’s dance.” He clenched his butt a few times around Shepard’s finger, hoping to communicate what he meant. Whether or not Shepard felt it, he withdrew his finger. The bed shifted as he moved closer, getting himself into position and leaning over James’s back. A moment later James felt warm breath on his neck as Shepard kissed him and nipped at his ear.

“I thought you’d never ask,” he murmured, one hand curving around James’s waist to caress his abs. Presumably, he was using his other hand to guide his dick into position. James could feel the round, firm head poking against his butt, inching along until it was right where it needed to be. Then pressure, something that felt instinctively _wrong_ – that was supposed to be an exit-only orifice, James thought, a grin crossing his face – but it kept coming. It was too wide, it wasn’t going to fit. It was starting to hurt. And then with a rush of feeling James felt himself open and Shepard was _in_.

“ _Dios_ ,” James grunted. Steve reached out and ran a reassuring hand down James’s arm.

“Relax, Mr. Vega,” he said soothingly. “Let all the tension go, or it’ll just hurt. Loosen yourself up for him.”

James gritted his teeth and tried to do as Steve had suggested. He made a conscious effort to unclench his muscles, not only in his butt but throughout his body. He sagged a little, though he managed to keep himself from falling gracelessly onto his face. His efforts seemed to pay off – Shepard kept pushing in, but the intrusion proceeded more smoothly than it had before. Shepard went deeper, still trailing feathery caresses over James’s neck. James squirmed, fighting the urge to whine in discomfort. That was it, surely... _that_ was as far in as Shepard could go...

Nope. There was more dick still incoming. James imagined he could feel the heat pulsing along that rigid shaft, and especially the thick knobby head now lodged inside him. Or could he really feel that? It was hard to tell. He was feeling a lot of unfamiliar things.

He couldn’t keep the pained whine in anymore. “ _Loco_...”

James stared fixedly down at Steve’s knees. His friend was still stroking his arm and whispering encouragement, but then – that was Steve. His best buddy, who’d seen him at his best and his worst. James couldn’t bring himself to turn his head and look Shepard in the eye, not when he could vividly imagine the pathetic expression he knew must be plastered across his face.

It couldn’t possibly have taken as long as it seemed to for Shepard to bury himself fully inside. James knew when they’d reached that point because Shepard’s smooth, muscular thighs pressed against his butt. He concentrated on staying relaxed and taking deep breaths.

Shepard, meanwhile, seemed more than satisfied with their position.

“Oh, boy,” he said huskily, his lips against James’s neck. “You’re _tight_ , Vega. That’s a nice tight hole. Oh... _yeah_.” He shifted against him, giving the muscles of James’s chest an affectionate squeeze. “Yeah, that’s good.”

“Glad you’re enjoying it, Loco,” James managed.

“Give him a minute, Shepard,” Steve said, and James shot him a grateful glance.

“Of course,” Shepard said. “I’m not a _complete_ dickhead. Well-”

Steve opened his mouth to say something, but Shepard cut him off. “No, don’t. Just _don’t._ Shut up, you.”

Snickering, Steve waved at him to continue.

“I’m not going to just pile-drive a guy who’s been fucked once in his life ten years ago,” Shepard insisted. “Or however long ago. Gotta let him adjust, right?”

James was glad to hear that.

“Besides, I’m a patient man,” Shepard went on conversationally. “I’ve waited for months for this delicious Latino tail... I can stand a few more minutes to hear Jimmy Vega cry my name and beg me to fuck him like a little bitch.”

The last few words were whispered right in James’s ear, accompanied by bristles of facial hair and soft touches that sent ticklish shivers up and down his sides. For some reason the words, rather than igniting his defensive machismo as they might in other circumstances, drove James crazy with lust. The protestation that he was _not_ about to be anyone’s little bitch died on his tongue as he found himself aching for... what, he didn’t know, but _something_ more than Shepard was giving him. He turned his head so he could look Shepard in the eye, their faces centimeters apart.

“So?” James said with more bravado than he felt. “Show me what you got.”

Shepard nosed briefly against his cheek. “Gladly,” he purred. He pulled almost all the way out, securing his arms around James’s stomach and chest, then glided back in. At once they were connected, in more ways than one, pulsing in and out steadily, and James knew just what it was that Steve had been feeling before. He knew how it felt to be fucked, and he loved it. No longer ashamed to let the moans flow from his lips, James rolled his hips back against Shepard’s – anything to keep that dick grinding around inside him. It was almost as if some great revelation had descended upon him. He didn’t remember it feeling anywhere _near_ this good all those years ago. This was a deep, visceral pleasure, and was it ever addictive – almost unbearably so. His sensory world had all but collapsed to the rigid length of cock plunging in and out of his body, and he never wanted it to stop. They shuddered together, Shepard echoing his moans, James clenching his hands into the bedclothes and forcing an iron will down on the maddening urge to jerk off.

Steve was watching him with an enraptured expression, fist working his cock in an identical rhythm. His lips were slightly parted, and he was panting with eager lust as he watched the two of them fuck. James’s eyes fell on the dark, swollen head of Steve’s dick just as a bead of precome bloomed at the tip. Instinctively, he leaned forward to flick it with his tongue. It tasted like the dick in his ass felt. Steve groaned his approval and reached up to run his hand through James’s mohawk. James looked up at him through a haze that filled his vision as he wrapped his mouth around the head of his friend’s dick.

“Yeah,” Steve said, voice raspy with lust. “Yeah... fuck him, Shepard. Fuck him. Fuck him.”

James’s eyes drifted closed as Shepard complied with enthusiasm. The pump of his hips was slow, but deliciously forceful and regular. The steady slap-slap of his thighs on James’s ass underscored the grunts neither of them cared to stifle. James threw himself into blowing Steve as best he could, hardly recognizing the crazed lust for cock that being fucked had somehow ignited inside him. He couldn’t get more than a few inches of Steve into his mouth with his whole body constantly rocked by Shepard’s thrusts, but Steve clearly appreciated it all the same. He kept up a constant stream of whispered encouragement, telling James what a good job he was doing and how beautiful he looked.

James didn’t know how long they writhed together on the bed, but at some point he realized the pounding of his heart in his head and his dick was becoming too much. He needed release, and he needed it badly. He wanted to come, more than anything. He wanted the spunk to fly from his cock and feel the burst of the resulting orgasm shake his whole body, as he knew it would. With some effort, he popped Steve’s cock out of his mouth and spoke.

“Loco, I gotta... blow. I gotta. Loco... you promised.”

Shepard hardly needed to ask what he meant. He, too, was lost in the fuck, his arms tight around James’s chest, mouth pressed against his skin.

“Steve?” Shepard said hoarsely, nuzzling James’s shoulder.

“Yeah,” Steve answered. Quickly, he shifted forward until he could lean back onto the bed, as close to the two of them as he could get. He lifted his legs and tugged them up to his chest with both hands, exposing his hole already wet with lube. James stared, practically salivating at the sight.

“Fuck me, Jimmy,” Steve whispered.

James reached out to his side, groping around for the bottle of lube. Shepard pressed it into his hand and he fumbled with the lid, managing to open it this time and squirting a generous amount onto his hand. He slicked it down over his cock, barely managing to keep the motion agonizingly slow. He had no idea how he was going to last more than a few seconds in Steve’s ass, but goddamnit, he would last as long as he could.

“Yeah...” James said, inching his knees forward to get a little closer. Shepard came with him, still shuddering against his back and filling the core of his body with little bursts of warm pleasure. Like James, he seemed to be fighting with his self-control, trying to draw out the fuck as long as he could. Still, even he seemed dangerously close to the edge. While James reapplied the lube to his cock, Shepard sucked and nibbled on his neck, hugging him tightly from behind and groaning, The deep vibrations of his voice so close to James’s ear only intensified his lust, as impossible as that seemed. He wanted to fuck Shepard as hard as he wanted to fuck Steve, but that could wait. James vowed that if he had to, he would personally kill every Reaper monstrosity in the galaxy to get his chance at fucking Commander Shepard and hearing those same noises from the other end.

Finally, he was ready. Steve was beneath him, imploring James with his eyes to fill him with cock. Shepard slowed his pace to give James a chance to get into position, ever unable to keep his mouth away from dark skin for long.

“Vega sandwich,” Shepard murmured in James’s ear. “I like it. I fucking love it. You’re good, Vega... a real good fuck. So hot and tight for me.”

“You’d damn well better start doing it faster and harder than that, Loco,” James shot back. “I don’t have all night.”

Shepard let out a bark of laughter. “You want it harder, Jimmy boy? You want me to fuck your ass harder?”

“ _Yes_ ,” James ground out, blinking furiously as he tried to focus on his cock and get it into Steve’s waiting hole.

“Say it,” Shepard hissed in his ear. “Say, ‘Commander Shepard, I order you to fuck my ass as hard as you can.’”

“Fuck my fucking ass as hard as you can, Loco,” James demanded, bracing himself to either side of Steve’s shoulders. “I _want_ you to _fuck me harder,_ goddamnit!”

“Done,” Shepard said, plunging into him hard enough to push him forward, and with the momentum James sank his cock balls-deep into Steve all at once. All three of them made choked noises of relief, and as one they resumed their intimate rhythm.

“ _Fuuuck_ ,” James whined. “Oh, fucking hell that’s hot. Yeah, fuck me, Loco, _fuck_ me!”

Shepard needed no encouragement. It was euphoria. James’s range of motion was limited with Shepard pressing against his back, but he barely had to move to stimulate his excited nerves. If he pressed back, Shepard’s cock dug deeper into him; when he pressed forward, it was into Steve’s tight warmth. Close to the edge as he was and already driven crazy by Shepard, James let himself go with a howl. He fucked like an animal, pounding Steve’s ass as hard as he could while being pounded himself by Shepard on every backstroke. The dazed, happy expression on Steve’s face and the steady beat of his hand on his cock was enough to convince James that he wasn’t being too rough. He kept it up, knowing it wouldn’t be long before he busted.

“Oh, yeah,” Shepard breathed, amused and aroused by James’s sudden frenzy. He leaned back a little, sliding his hands down James’s sides. “Like that, eh? You just love being a Vega sandwich... fucked from both ends at once. Yeah, you’re a lucky guy... looks like a lot of fun.”

James could barely have strung a coherent sentence together if he tried, but Shepard didn’t seem to need an answer. His hands had settled on James’s hips, squeezing and kneading his muscular ass as he fucked it. “That’s a good soldier... yeah. Give it to him, Jimmy. Give him a good hard fuck, give him what you’re getting from me.”

James groaned inarticulately, dancing right on the razor’s edge of orgasm. Shepard’s soft, lustful words were exactly the kind of thing guaranteed to push him over that threshold. He couldn’t keep it up. Really, he was surprised he’d lasted anywhere near this long.

“I’m sorry, man, I gotta...” James gasped to Steve. “I gotta pull out, I’m gonna-”

Steve’s skin was covered with a sheen of sweat, his eyes glazed as he stared adoringly up at James. He nodded. “It’s fine... go ahead.”

James drew back and out, his thighs and abs tensing, just barely ahead of the flood. His cock surged forward along dark skin beside Steve’s, semen erupting from the tip in a sticky jet. Even after the duration and intensity of stimulation he’d endured without ejaculating, the force behind his orgasm startled him. His first shot splattered Steve’s neck and the pillow behind his head. The second got some on his face, and the third and fourth reached as high as his chest. James didn’t even notice the mess he was making for several moments. His body from his chest to his knees burned with bright, raw ecstasy. Shepard’s stiff cock was like a hot rod buried in his gut, leaving buzzing trails of potent sensation with every penetration. It took James several moments to realize that the strangled, whiny noise he could hear was coming from his own mouth.

Heaving for breath, body still abuzz and his mind thoroughly scrambled, James tried to recover. It would take him a while. Beneath him, Steve’s eyes were half-closed in bliss, having enjoyed the erotic display and the accompanying deluge of spunk. Overcome with affection for his buddy, James leaned down to give him a clumsy kiss, in the process tasting some of his own release on Steve’s chin. The taste was familiar from earlier, similar to the precome. While it was hardly what he would call pleasant, it wasn’t bad, either. Still reeling from the strength of his orgasm, James proceeded to lick Steve’s face clean. He loved the rough texture of Steve’s stubble against his tongue, and he could feel his friend smiling.

A warm, slick hand closed around his dick, still jumping with his heartbeat. James let out a soft moan as Steve stroked him slowly, bringing him down from the high. Behind him, Shepard had slowed his pace, though his harsh breathing indicated he was near his own release. His cock slipped out of James’s ass and into his hand, and James heard him jerking himself furiously.

Grinning up at him, Steve smoothed the palm of his hand over the end of James’s dick. The smooth pressure on head, intensely oversensitive after his orgasm, sent a powerful pulse throughout his body, making him jerk.

“ _Esteban_ ,” James panted, unable to say anything else. Steve said nothing, just palmed him again, enjoying the way James’s whole body responded.

A moment later James jumped as he felt something sliding back up his ass. It wasn’t a dick, though – Shepard had two fingers of his free hand buried inside him. The sight of it was apparently too much for Shepard, and a moment later he let out a giggling moan and came. James heard and felt the warm wetness as it slopped up his back, as high as the nape of his neck. Two or three jets followed the first, and several more less intense ejections coated the small of his back. Shepard withdrew his fingers and collapsed against him, breathing like he’d just run a marathon and nuzzling James’s shoulder happily. He seemed not to care that he was smearing his own jizz all over himself in the process.

“Esteban wins,” James declared, having caught back some of his breath. He leaned back a little, pushing Shepard up with him, before reaching down to take Steve’s cock in his hand and starting to stroke.

“I didn’t... realize we were keeping track,” Steve said lazily, watching James with a gleam in his eye. His expression soon slackened as James tightened his grip and quickened his stroke, taking care to slide Steve’s foreskin over the head of his dick on each pass. It didn’t take long for Steve to tense, rolling his head back and sighing as he ejaculated. Several strong shots added to the mess already on his stomach and chest, mixing there with James’s cooling spunk.

“Beautiful,” Shepard said again, and James had to agree. The sight of his friend splayed beneath him covered in come, thoroughly fucked and satisfied, touched something deep and hot in his heart. For a moment, a shadow of the threat they faced passed over him, and James found himself wondering if the three of them would ever get a chance like this again. He shoved the unhappy thoughts away, determined to cherish what he had while he had it. He leaned down to plant another brief kiss on Steve’s lips, then twisted around to give one to Shepard too. Shepard responded with unexpected gentleness, cradling James’s jaw in his hand and flicking his tongue along soft lips.

Finally, James collapsed in utter exhaustion on the bed beside Steve, the thought crossing his mind that there was no _way_ they could all go to sleep like this. He remembered the wash of semen that covered his back a split second before he landed on the bed, and he groaned, reaching up to cover his eyes.

“Shit.”

Steve and Shepard were both laughing uproariously at him, having immediately worked out what pained him.

“Don’t worry about it, Vega,” Shepard said comfortably. “We have clean sheets.”

James chuckled. “Good to know. That... that was definitely the best fuck I’ve ever had in my life. _Felicitaciones_.”

Shepard settled onto his back next to him across from Steve, leaning in to nip briefly at his earlobe. “I said we wanted you to ‘come’ between us, didn’t I?”

“Oh, good one,” James said dryly. “ _Muy bueno_. After the war, when they interview me about my role under the great Commander Shepard, I’m gonna tell them about the time you made a spunk joke.”

“Pfft,” Shepard said dismissively. “Nobody’ll believe you. The legend kills Reapers and saves civilizations, he doesn’t make bad sexual puns.”

“Eh, maybe,” James conceded. “But I’ll know the truth – the ‘legend’ is just a dude who moans when he comes like any other. Though... I guess you _are_ an exceptionally awesome dude.”

“I know,” Shepard said brightly. “You’re not a bad guy yourself, Vega.”

“Thanks, Loco.”

“Awwww...” Steve piped up. “You two are warming my heart.”

James smiled, then squirmed a little, wincing at the feeling of the now-cold wetness between his back and the bed. “I don’t suppose I can use that private shower of yours to clean up, eh Loco?”

“No,” Shepard said.

James blinked. “No?”

“No. You have to walk through the ship naked with my come all over your back.”

James turned his head to look him in the eye. Shepard was wearing his Commander face, deadly serious.

James raised his eyebrows and reached up to rub his forehead. “Loco-”

“He’s _joking_ , Mr. Vega,” Steve laughed, just as Shepard’s face cracked and he started laughing too. “You can use the shower.”

“Well, good. Otherwise, you know I’d just wipe myself off on your dress blues, or something.”

Some time later, after the three of them had washed up and James was in the process of putting his underwear back on, the question occurred to him of what he was supposed to do now. Shepard and Steve seemed to be getting ready for bed, and he could hardly blame them – it was past midnight shipboard time, and the Reapers wouldn’t stop destroying the galaxy while the three of them got some much needed rest. There was a war to get back to in the morning, and he needed to get some sleep himself. But it seemed painfully awkward to just... leave, after the riotous bout of sex they’d just had.

Shepard noticed him eyeing his clothes on the couch, stilled by indecision, and rolled his eyes. “You can stay here tonight, Vega.”

James looked up at him. “Really?”

“If you want.”

He did want, but... “You sure, Loco?”

Shepard gave him an exasperated look. “Still with the ‘are you sure’? Would I have _offered_ if I wasn’t sure?”

No, James thought, that was a good point. Shepard wasn’t one to go back on what he’d said. And Steve was looking at him with what seemed a hopeful smile. Distantly, through a haze of time and alcohol, James remembered that Steve was fond of cuddling.

“Well,” he said, folding his arms over his bare chest. “In that case... how can I refuse?”

Shepard smiled and indicated the bed. “Plenty of room for all of us.”

That, as it turned out, was a bit of an overestimation. The bed was just barely large enough to comfortably hold all three of them. James decided that if Shepard and Steve were okay with him sleeping in the same bed as them, then they should be prepared to deal with all of him. With his broad frame, he staked out a claim in the middle of the bed, while Shepard and Steve settled in to either side of him.

Shepard set the lights to dim slowly and his music player to emit a quiet static that effectively blanketed out the noise of the ship. Sighing, squeaky clean, thoroughly satisfied and still pleasantly drunk, James started to drift off almost immediately. He settled his arms around both of his dudes, kissed Steve on his forehead and then Shepard in the same place.

“Damn, he’s warm, isn’t he?” Shepard commented as he snuggled up next to James.

“I told you,” Steve mumbled back, his eyes already closed. “He’s like a big, sexy teddy bear. Just for us.”

“Grrr,” James said sleepily. Shepard snorted.


End file.
